__Making A List__
By Escargoat



“Oh, God. Giles,” Buffy panted as he pushed her up against the wall, his teeth gently nipping along her jaw.

He moaned in response and pushed her harder against the wall.

Three weeks. Three very, very long weeks he had been trying to keep his hands off of her. That cute little butt, those sexy little legs, and that horrid little pout of hers had tormented him in his dreams. His body had threatened to betray him at any moment. His mind had even conjured up an imagination of Anya telling them to go at it, but he had prevailed.

He had prevailed until Buffy had somehow spilled her mocha into his lap. It had not hurt, not really. There was not enough spilt to really reach his skin much. But Buffy had felt awful about ruining his slack and had grabbed his handkerchief to mop up the spill. She had kept on stroking even when she had mopped up the spill.

The only logical response for him was to push her up against the wall and snog her senseless.

* * * * *

Anya grinned and blew on her nails in a self-congratulatory way. She wasn’t really sure what buffing your nails had to do with a good job, but she had seen it several times in various movies, so it seemed appropriate in this case.

Gingerly, she placed the bow back in the case on the wall. After several experimentations, she had figured out exactly how to shoot an arrow in just the right way. Buffy’s spilt coffee had turned out particularly well.

With a quick glance over her shoulder to make certain that her ignominious boss was nowhere in sight, she pulled out her palm pilot. She frowned at it for a second. The Powers That Be really needed to watch their budget controls. There was no way that someone in her position should have gotten a palm pilot, but she was not about to point that out to them. She was certain that they had some slob somewhere that was supposed to learn the importance of cost control.

Shaking her head at the general stupidity of The Powers That Be, she pulled up her secret list.

Anya liked to call it her “People that need help” list. Or more specifically, people that need help before Cupid got to them and ruined their lives. Xander still was not over her. That Anya was certain of. She was very hard to get over. Willow was already in a relationship, so according to the rules, she was off limits. Dawn needed help, but Anya needed some time to think about that one…

“Anya, my dear. Fetch me some water before I die of thirst,” Cupid swooned.

Anya quickly shoved her list back in her pocket. “I could only dream,” she muttered under her breath as she went to get a glass.

“What was that?”

“I said it’s nice that you ruin people’s dreams. You know, down with the happy ending. On with the angst,” Anya replied as she handed him his water.

“That’s the spirit. Now, I believe I’ve been neglecting your friends.”

“My friends? They aren’t mine. In fact, I barely even liked them. I loathed them and their petty humans ways. Why don’t you look somewhere else?” Anya babbled nervously.

Cupid looked at her and turned on his viewer.

A very naked Buffy was pinning an equally naked Giles to the floor.

“Oh, my, how did this happen?”

“Fate?” Anya said flatly.

“Fate? Fate! Blast him and his fate-y ways. Love, soul mates, eternal friendship, people that are destined to stay together through thick and thin, I tell you, he’s gone soft. Whatever happened to ill fate I ask you? Noooo, he’s got to be all love and kisses nowadays. It’s the societal pressure.”

“Well, you at least you still have your principles,” Anya offered.

“Yes, yes I do. Now then, what about that Andrew chap? I think that a couple of gorgeous women should do him fine.”

“Isn’t he gay?”

“Yes, of course. That is the point. He’ll become a woman magnet, but be secretly tormented by his gayness. It’s brilliant!”

“But why not make a straight man a woman magnet?”

Cupid glared at Anya. “Because… Oh, never mind. Honestly, I think for one moment that you are finally getting this and then you get all sappy on me. I have to go pick out a couple of super models. Try to do something useful while I’m gone.”

Anya nodded and watched him leave. She really didn’t like Andrew all that much. And she had died while he had lived. And if she did anything, Cupid would know for sure that it had been her. And there were lots and lots of really good reasons not to do anything.

She walked determinedly away from the portal. She stared at the selection of bows on the wall. She glanced back at the portal.

“Oh well, what’s another millennia?”

* * *