They had kept their relationship a secret. Not because they were ashamed, but they wanted to keep it private. Hold it close. And they were very careful.

Giles bounced between absolute joy and absolute panic. If Buffy were pregnant, he knew what would happen. Joyce would kill him. She might anyway. He dreaded her finding out about this, but he knew that Buffy would tell her, eventually. And that was how it should be, of course.

Buffy made her way to Giles'. She took the long way. She went through the Park and one of the cemeteries. She would do the alternate route on her way home. It was only 9:30pm, but she came across two Vampires. Giles would have been proud. She plunged and moved on. She was afraid not to.Her period should have started today. It didn't. Was she pregnant? She couldn't deny the warm glow at the thought of carrying his child. But, she wasn't ready and she knew it. They, as a couple, weren't ready.

Of course, that won't mean a thing if she didn't start her period. If she were pregnant.... Well, she would have a baby. She could never get rid of it. So, she would have a baby and her Mom would have a cow.When she got to Giles', she let herself in with her key.

When he heard the front door open, then close, Giles left the kitchen for the living room. As soon as he saw her, he knew. He took her in his arms and sat with her on the couch.

"It's all right Luv." He told her, then kissed her forehead. "No matter what happens, it'll be all right."

Buffy looked up at him. She realized that she didn't know how he felt about all this, not really. She'd assumed that he felt the same way she did. But suddenly, she wondered. "Rupert. How do you feel about this?"

"What?" Giles asked in return. "How do I feel about what?"

"A baby." She clarified. "Do you want a baby?"

"I hadn't really thought about it much until the last couple weeks. Not for a long while." Giles said. "I don't know really. The thought of you having my baby fills wonder and awe. And no small measure of terror. I do know that we aren't ready, neither of us. And the selfish part of me doesn't want to share you just yet."

Buffy nodded her head in understanding. It wasn't much different from the way she, herself, felt. She laid her cheek against his chest and listened to his heartbeat. Thump, thump, thump. "It's not like I've never been late before." She pointed out.

"True." Giles agreed. "You skipped the month of the Mayor's Ascension entirely."

"It scares me that you know that." Buffy commented. She heard his chuckle. "And I haven't felt sick or anything." She closed her eyes.

"That's a good sign." Giles said. "You have seemed rather tired though."

He pointed out hesitantly.

"I think that's because of you." Buffy said with a smile. She kept her eyes closed. "If I haven't started in a couple of days, I guess we should get one of those tests."

"I suppose." Giles said.

They sat there contentedly for a while. Giles broke the silence. "I love you Buffy. No matter what happens, I love you."

"I know." Buffy said as she snuggled deeper into his embrace. "I love you too."

They went on like that for several days. Worried. On the fifth day, Buffy decided it was time to buy a test. So it was a very distracted Buffy that joined her Mother for breakfast.

Joyce watched Buffy as she ate, absently. "Honey, is anything wrong?"

"Hmm?" Buffy focused on her Mom. "Sorry. What?"

"Is something wrong?" Joyce asked again.

"No." "Why?" Buffy asked in return.

"You just don't seem like yourself this morning. The last couple of days actually." Joyce said concerned. "Are you sure nothing's bothering you?"

<I'm in love with my 45-year-old ex-Watcher. We're sleeping together and now I might be pregnant. > Yeah, Mom would react calmly to that. "If I told her that I might as well leave him tied up in the cemetery over night. > "I'm fine Mom. Just thinkin'." She finally said.

"Must be deep thoughts." Joyce commented. She looked at her daughter consideringly. Buffy had been by turns, happy and distracted all week. A thought struck her, "Have you met a guy?" Another thought, "Angel isn't back, is he?"

"Not that I'm aware of." Buffy said. "I haven't heard from him since Graduation." She shrugged. It didn't bother her anymore. She wasn't sure it ever really had. "What makes you think there's a guy?" <Oh God. > What had she given away?

"Mother's intuition." Joyce said. The only way she could explain it.

"You want to talk about it? Tell me about him?"

Buffy looked at her Mom. Not telling her Mom was one thing. Lying to her was something else. "I don't think I'm ready for that just yet." Massive understatement.

Joyce was a little disappointed. "All right Honey. When you're ready to talk, I'll be here." She paused. "Just ... Well, it's not a Vampire, is it?" Buffy almost laughed. "No, Mom. Not a Vamp. I promise."

Buffy was supposed to meet Willow in an hour. They were moving in to the dorm today. She decided to get a test, but she was also going to make a doctor's appointment. She had to be sure.

She went to a little convenient store that she'd never been to before. Once she had the test, she went to Giles'. She knew that he wouldn't be there, but there was no way that she was taking it to her Mom's. She shuddered at the thought.

Once at Giles', she took out his phone book. By the time she found a doctor, called and made an appointment, it was time to meet Willow.Frustrated at the lack of time, she took the test upstairs and left it in the bedroom. Then, she left to meet Willow.

When Giles returned home, several hours later, he went upstairs to change. He found the pregnancy test where it sat on the bureau. He picked it up and sat on the bed and looked at it. What were they going to do?

Buffy and Willow decided to celebrate. They called Oz and Xander from the dorm, and told them to meet them at the Bronze.

Buffy wanted to call Giles. She hadn't seen him all day, except for when he stopped by the dorm. And Willow was there. No cuddle. No smoochies. She'd see him after the Bronze, tell him about the appointment tomorrow.

It was 10p when Buffy and Willow crossed through the Park, headed for the Bronze. Buffy suddenly stopped and looked around.

"Uh oh." Willow said.

A demon. It was huge. Gray with horns but no tail.

Buffy stepped in front of Willow when it came towards them. She looked, but didn't see any more.

It circled them. "I can smell your power." It snarled.

Buffy wrinkled her nose. "Yeah, well, I can smell you too." She looked at Willow, "Run."

Willow ran.

Willow ran as fast as she could. She knew that if she stayed she would only be a constant distraction to Buffy. So, she did the only thing she could. She went for help.

She ran to the Bronze and got the guys. Oz drove them back in the van. They found Buffy sitting at a picnic table, her head rested on her arms.Buffy couldn't catch her breath. She heard them reach her, but didn't bother to look up. She knew who it was.

"Buffy?" Willow said. "Are you all right?"

Buffy nodded. "Just ... Catching ... My ... Breath." She said in gasps.

"Did you get him?" Xander asked.

Buffy looked at them and shook her head. She saw their eyes widen at the sight of the scratches on her face. "Strong." She took a couple of more breaths. "Giles. Need Giles."

Xander and Oz helped Buffy to the van. Willow followed and kept an eye out.

**********

When they reached Giles', Buffy had her breathing more or less under control. She walked up to the door under her own power, but the gang hovered around her.

When Giles opened the door and saw Buffy, he felt his blood drain to his toes. "Buffy, my God, what happened?" At the sight of the others, he barely restrained from taking her in his arms. As it was, he ushered her in and to the couch while he barked orders. "Willow, the first aid kit. Xander, a basin of water and a cloth." He laid her down on the couch and gently brushed a lock of hair from her cheek. "Are you all right? Can you tell me what
happened?"

The tender concern in his eyes nearly did her in. Buffy put a hand to his cheek, but removed it quickly when she realized that Oz watched with interest. "Demon." She said. "Gray. Big. Strong. Horns." She felt Giles hand touch her stomach. "I think I'm all right."

Giles closed his eyes for a moment. Ready for a baby or not, if it was there, he wanted it to be all right.

Willow put the first aid kit on the coffee table. Xander followed suit with the water basin and wash cloth.

Xander was worried. "Is she okay?" He asked.

Giles administered to Buffy with the cloth. "I think so." He said. Besides her cheek, she also had scratches on her arms.

"He got away, but I hurt him." Buffy told him. "Do you know what it is?"

"Describe it more carefully." Giles instructed. "Everything that you can remember. What he said. How he smelled. Did he say anything?"

"He told Buffy that he could smell her power." Willow said.

"All I could smell was him." Buffy said. Her face indicated her distaste.

"What did he smell like?" Giles asked.

"Yuck. Rotten eggs." Buffy told him. "Sulfur maybe. When I cut him the blood was kind of white. And it smelled like bleach. I thought I was going to throw up." She and Giles exchanged a significant look. "And it was big, real big. Chewbacca big. And strong."

Giles dabbed antiseptic on her scratches. He winced when she hissed.

"Sorry ... I guess we're in for a night of research."

Within an hour, Buffy had fallen asleep. "Should we take her home?" Willow asked.

Giles shook his head. He stood up, went over and picked Buffy up. She barely stirred as he carried her upstairs to the bedroom. He laid her gently on the bed, stripped off her pants to make her more comfortable and covered her.

She opened her eyes when he kissed her lightly on the lips. She smiled at him and was asleep again.

Downstairs, Xander had watched them go. "I feel like I'm missing something with those two." He looked at Willow and Oz.

"I've seen it too." Willow agreed. "I can't figure it out though. It's so weird."

Oz never looked up from his book. He didn't want them to see his grin.Giles returned downstairs and they continued to research. When they hadn't found anything by 2am, Giles sent them home. He assured them that Buffy would be fine. And that he had spent many a night on the couch (which was true, but he didn't tell them that he had no intention of sleeping on it).

Once they were gone, he researched for a while longer before he joined Buffy in the bed upstairs.

He stripped to his boxers and slid in beside Buffy. She didn't wake, but she rolled over and wrapped an arm around him. He reciprocated and fell asleep.

Buffy woke due to the hand massaging her breast. They were lying spoon fashion. She wiggled her backside and felt something poke her.

"Somebody's awake." She rolled over to face him. "Good morning. Not that I'm complaining, but how did I get here?" She ran her hand down his throat, over his chest and stomach to her objective; his already straining erection. Giles groaned and moved in her hand. "Well, you fell asleep on the couch. I carried you up." His hand moved up her bare thigh to cup her bottom.

"Are you sure that you're up to this?"

"Don't have to ask you that." Buffy said wickedly. She took her hand away from where she'd been stroking him. "Do you want me to stop?"

"God no." Giles said with feeling. "But I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't." Buffy assured him. She kissed his chest. She moved him to his back and straddled him. She rubbed her hands up his stomach, to his chest. She leaned down and kissed him as her thumb flicked his nipples. She nipped his lower lip, then sucked it into her mouth.

Giles could feel how wet she was against his stomach through her panties. He ran his hands down her back, under her panties to cup her bare cheeks. One hand slid father and he slipped two fingers inside her. He thrust them in and out in a synchronized rhythm with his tongue.

Buffy groaned and moved against his hand. She wiggled lower and rubbed against his erection. She then slid farther down to his knees. She grabbed the waistband of his boxers and pulled. When he sprang free, she leaned down and kissed him. His hips jerked and he groaned. She sat up and smiled satisfied and removed his boxers. Then she slid back up his body to settle herself over him. She teased him as she rubbed her wet center over him. She felt his hands at hips and jumped when he ripped off her panties.

Giles brought her mouth to his and thrust his tongue inside. He reached a shaky hand to the nightstand drawer for the condom he swore never to forget. After he put it on, he positioned her over him. With a hard thrust, he entered her and they groaned in unison. He rolled them over so that he was on top and began thrusting fiercely in and out of her.

Buffy wrapped her legs around his hips. "Rupert please." She cried out. Another thrust and she cried out again as she convulsed around him.He felt her tighten around him and it brought him over the edge. He thrust twice more and cried out his own release. "Buffy!"

They lay there a minute before he rolled to his side as he still held her tight. "One of these days, you're going to bloody well give me a stroke." Giles said to her, but his caressing hand on her hip belied his words.

"Wouldn't that be fun to explain." Buffy said with a breathless giggle. She lifted up to look at the clock, 8:17am. "Ugh." She looked at him serious now. "I have a doctor's appointment for 10." She told him.

"You didn't take the store test, did you?" Giles asked.

"I guess I could take it now." Buffy said. "But I won't feel certain until I've seen a doctor."

"Do you want me to go with you?" Giles asked, hesitant.

"Do you want to?" Buffy asked in return.

"Yes, actually." Giles told her. "Buffy, if you are pregnant, I want to be there with you. For you. I want to be a part of it."

"They're not going to tell us anything today, I asked." Buffy told him.

"They'll call later today or tomorrow with the results. But, if you want to go ... I'd like that." She saw him smile. "I wanted to ask. Can I use your phone number and address on the forms? I really don't want to use Mom's."

"Of course, Buffy." Giles responded. "You didn't have to ask."

"I don't live here Rupert." Buffy pointed out carefully.

"You ... You could if you wanted." Giles surprised her.

"I ... " She began, only to stop. "I guess I don't know what to say. Do you mean that?"

"Yes." He kissed her gently. "I love you Buffy. I want to spend my every waking minute with you. My non-waking too."

"What are you saying, exactly?" Buffy asked in a whisper.

Giles put hand to her cheek and looked at her intently. "I want to marry you Buffy."

Buffy could only stare at him, and then she felt a sinking sensation. "And if I'm not pregnant?" She asked.

"I don't care." He said urgently, then didn't like how it sounded. "W-well, of course I care. B-but, it's not why I want to marry you."

"Why do you?" Buffy asked.

"Because I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you." Giles said in exasperation.

Buffy swallowed past the lump in her throat. "I ... Um ... I need to get ready to go." She got out of the bed and ran for the bathroom. He looked at the closed bathroom door. "Not again." He flopped back on the bed. "Not exactly the response every man dreams of, was it?" He asked the empty room.

They drove to the doctor's office, just outside of town, in silence. Giles was quiet because he didn't know what to say. Buffy was quiet because she didn't know how to say what she wanted to. She wanted to throw her arms around him and say yes. But she was afraid. She was an 18 year old Slayer. How much longer could she stay ahead if the demons? One day when she'd been really bored, she'd talked Giles into giving her the Slayer's Handbook. Some of the information had been ... frightening. The average life expectancy of a Slayer. At 18, she'd already passed it. The most chilling had been that no Slayer had lived past 23. If she was lucky she might live long enough to graduate from college.

A tear slid down her cheek, unnoticed. How could she do that to him? Giles saw the tear, but didn't know what to do about it. What was she thinking? Whatever it was, it hurt.

They made to the doctor's office and Giles watched as Buffy filled out form after form. She used his address and phone number. She used his name for person to contact.

She finished the forms and gave them back to the receptionist. When she sat back down, she took his hand while they waited.

They went back in to the examining room. He held her other hand while the nurse drew the blood sample.

*********

It was noon before they returned to his place. They still hadn't talked. He was about to fix lunch, when there was a knock at the door. He opened the door to find Willow, Oz and Xander. And two large pizzas. He had forgotten their promise to return to help research. Buffy had been upstairs, but had come down at the racket. "Hey guys." She said upon seeing them.

"Hey Buff." Xander said. "Hope you slept well. Don't worry, we took up the slack with the research." His tone was joking, but his eyes were concerned.

"And I appreciate it," Buffy returned in the same tone. "After all, a sleepy Slayer is..."

"A cranky Slayer." Willow and Xander finished in unison, then laughed.Buffy smiled at them. On the surface, she seemed fine. But her eyes ... Giles wondered if he were the only one that noticed. As the day went on, he realizes that he wasn't. Xander tried so hard to make her laugh and Willow.... She kept looking at her worried, then would look at him in question. And Oz, well. You never knew what he was thinking, but he didn't miss much. At some point, Willow found a description that sounded like their demon. When the phone rang at about a quarter to six, Xander was up so Giles asked him to answer it.

Xander answered the phone on the bar between the kitchen and living room. "Hello. Giles'" He paused and his eyes widened. "Just a minute." He put the phone to his chest and looked at Buffy, really worried about her now. "It's for you Buff." He saw her and Giles exchange a look before she got up. Whatever was going on, Giles knew about it. Xander gave her a searching look as he gave her the phone. She wouldn't meet his eyes.

Buffy took the phone. "This is Buffy." She was aware that at least two pairs of ears in the room were listening. She tried to sound casual. The words of the nurse were slowly sinking in. "Yes, thank you." She absently hung up the phone. She stood there, her hand still on the phone, her face blank.

It scared the hell out of Giles. Xander too. It didn't do much for Willow and Oz, either.

Giles got up, went over to her and maneuvered her into the kitchen.

"Xander, who was on the phone?" Willow asked nervously.

"A doctor's office." Xander said, his eyes on the now closed door of the kitchen.

In the kitchen, Giles was holding Buffy. Her glazed expression frightened him. "What did they say?" He asked, then held his breath.

"I'm not pregnant." Buffy said in an emotionless tone.

Giles was confused. "You're not pregnant. Then, why are you so upset?"

"I ... I don't know. We're not ready. I'm not ready for a baby." She said, disjointedly. "But ... I don't know ... I guess a part of me really wanted it."

Giles kissed the top of her head. "I see." And he did. A part of him was disappointed as well. "It's all right." He rocked her in his arms. "We have time."

She pushed away from him. "Time? What kind of time? A couple of years? Probably less."

Giles was at loss. "What are you talking about Buffy?"

"I'm talking about me." Buffy said sadly. "And the not so likelihood of my ever living long enough to see a child."

Giles was stunned. "Buffy..."

"No, don't." Buffy interrupted him. "I don't think I can do this. I don't want you to go through that again." She struggled though her emotions.

"You had to grieve the death of one lover. I won't be the second."

"Is this why you ran off this morning?" He asked. At her nod, he continued. "I did grieve for Jenny yes, but ... She was never my lover. I loved her. But it was.... Well, it doesn't compare to what I feel for you. She would have made a good partner, I think, but we'll never know. But you ... Buffy, you are my other half. And even if you never share my bed again, that will not change. No matter what our relationship from this moment on, if you were to die before me ... My heart. My soul would be ripped in two. I love you Buffy. *That* will not die."

Buffy wiped the tears from her cheeks and sniffled. She took the handkerchief that Giles offered. "Boy do you know how to ruin a perfectly good act of sacrifice."

"I don't want your sacrifices Buffy." Giles explained. "I want you. Even if you do have a fetish for hiding in the bathroom when you're upset." He caught her as she threw herself in to his arms.

"Is that offer from this morning still open?" She asked.His answer was a toe curling kiss.

"Maybe we should check on them." Willow said.

"I don't know if that's a good idea." Oz commented.

"Why would a doctor's office call Buffy here?" Xander asked.

Willow and Xander exchanged worried looks and stood up. They headed for the kitchen door, followed by, a somewhat, but not entirely, reluctant Oz. When Willow pushed the swinging door open, two Slayerettes' jaws dropped open. One Werewolf smiled.

There, in the kitchen, stood one Slayer and one former Watcher in a passionate embrace. At least, he stood. Her feet weren't touching the floor. Xander blinked, but he couldn't erase the image. Buffy, her back to the wall, her legs wrapped around Giles waist, Giles' hands on her butt and they were kissing. If they didn't stop soon, Xander was going to need a cold shower.

"Oh my God." Willow exclaimed, having finally found her voice. That, finally, got Buffy and Giles' attention. They pulled their mouths apart and turned their heads to look at them.

"Uh-oh." Buffy said. She unhooked her legs and Giles set her down. She stood in front of him.

"When did this...?" Willow began, then stopped. Impossibly her eyes widened even more. "New York." She looked at Buffy hurt. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Actually, that's my fault. " Giles said. "I asked Buffy not to say anything just yet."

"Why?" Xander asked.

"It seemed best at the time." Giles said. "It's ... Awkward."

"Wh.." Xander was about to ask why, but decided it just didn't matter. He just put the whole thing aside for now. "We came in here to ask about the doctor." He looked at Buffy.

"Oh." Buffy said. "I was worried about something, but I'm fine." She could feel her face redden. "Thanks for worrying guys, but I'm fine. Really."

Finally, Xander couldn't hold it in any longer. "God Buffy. What have you got against guys your own age?" He sighed. "At least he's way better than deadboy."

"Thank you Xander." Giles said wryly.

"And no demon the morning after." Buffy commented without thinking.

"I so didn't need that visual." Xander complained.

"Are you guys okay with this?" Buffy asked. She looked from Willow to Xander, with a glance at Oz.

"I guess. Yeah." Willow said. "I'm surprised to say the least. But I am kind of fond of both of you."

Xander shrugged. "Like I said. Way better than deadboy." He quirked a half smile. "I guess it even kinda' makes sense. You guys already share so much." Everybody stared at him. "What? I can't have insight."

"It's not something we're used to." Buffy commented. "So, any ideas on how to break it to Mom?"

Willow and Xander looked at each other. In unison, they turned and left the kitchen. Oz ahead of them.

Buffy closed the swinging door and turned to Giles with a grin. "I knew that would work."

"What are we going to tell your Mother?" Giles asked. She looked at him surprised. "The truth."

Giles looked worried. "Not all of it, I hope." He muttered.

"There are things that you just can't tell your Mother." Buffy concluded.

"She'll hate this, you know." Giles pointed out.

"Maybe. But she loves me." Buffy pointed out herself.

"True enough." Giles said, then kissed her hungrily.

Xander was in bed that night, just about to fall asleep, when it hit him. Why Buffy had gone to the doctor. He groaned. "Eww." After that, he couldn't fall asleep.