Xander, with Anya, came into Giles' place talking. "Okay Giles, what's so important that it couldn't wait until morning? And why did I have to stop for blood? Is Deadboy here?"

 Giles took the blood from him. "Xander, sit down and shut up." He went into the kitchen, grabbed a mug and headed for the back room.  When he came back, Xander and Anya were sitting on the couch. Xander was watching Ethan warily.

 "What's the what, Giles?" Xander asked.

 "I'd rather only have to go through it once, thank you." Giles said. "Once Willow and Tara arrive, I'll explain as best I can." He looked at Ethan. "Did you by chance make any more coffee?"

 "I'll get it." Ethan said and went into the kitchen.

 "Giles, ..." Xander began.

 "Please, just don't, Xander." Giles said tiredly. "I'm really not up for it. Ethan won't be staying long in any case."

 "I heard that." Ethan said from the kitchen. "I come all the way from London just to check on you and that's the thanks I get?"

 Giles met Ethan's eyes over the kitchen counter. "Thank you, Ethan." Giles said drily. "How's that?"

 Ethan shrugged and brought Rupert the cup of coffee. "Better, anyway."

 The door opened and Willow and Tara came in. "Finally." Xander said with feeling. "Giles?"

 "Do you want the good news or the bad news?" Ethan asked.

 "Seems to me that it's the same." Buffy said from the hallway that led to the kitchen. Four pairs of eyes swung in her direction.

 "Buffy?" Xander and Willow were halfway to her when she put up a hand to stop them.

 "It seems that we missed something when Buffy ... Died." Giles said softly.

 "Like the fact that she wasn't dead?" Xander asked.

 "No, I'm dead." Buffy said petulantly. "I also happen to be a vampire." She vamped out and Tara gasped in fear. Buffy resumed her human visage and looked down, unable to meet their eyes.

 Willow looked at Giles with wide eyes. "How?" She squeaked out. "Is she ...?"

 "She is the Buffy we've come to know over the years." Giles assured them.

 "Slayers don't lose their souls when they're turned." Anya said matter of factly. "But I thought she was killed by a Slauver demon."

 "She was." Giles said.

 "I was." Buffy said at the same time.

 "I don't get it." Anya said.

 "Me either." Willow seconded. "Giles, how could this happen?"

 "I haven't the foggiest, Willow." Giles responded wearily.

 Anya looked at Buffy with narrowed eyes. "Did you ever drink from Angel?" She asked.

 "No." Buffy told her with a disgusted look. "And can I add, eww?"

 Anya shrugged, unconcerned. "It was a thought."

 "Buffy?" Willow said as she moved towards her. She reached out a hand, but Buffy pulled away. "It doesn't matter, Buffy."

 "It matters to me, Will." Buffy said quietly. "It matters a lot. I'm a vampire." She said through clenched teeth. "Giles won't stake me."

 "Of course not." Willow said. "He loves you." Giles eyes shot to her. "Just like we do." Giles sighed in relief until he saw Ethan's grin.

 "I can't do this, Will." Buffy said. "I can't be a vampire."

 "You can do anything, Buff." Xander said.

 "Don't you mean, Deadgirl?" Buffy asked. Xander flinched. "God, I can't even just die like a normal person. No Rest in Peace for Buffy." She said angrily.

"Do you think I want an eternity of being the Slayer? The only comfort that I had about dying was that at least I'd be at peace."

 "Then, here." Ethan said and tossed her a stake. "Quit your pissin' and moanin' and just do it."

 "Ethan!" Giles said harshly.

 Nobody moved as Buffy picked up the stake and held it to her heart. Giles could see the rivulet of blood where she'd pierced the skin. "Buffy, please." Buffy met his anguished eyes with her own. Then, she ran out the door, before they could stop her.

 Giles turned on Ethan. Ethan began to speak before he could. "If it's what she really wants, you won't be able to stop her. If it isn't, then she'll be back."


   Buffy sat on that hill. That same hill where Angel had decided to end it all.  She heard her own words to him that night. ** Strong is fighting! It's hard, and it's painful, and it's everyday. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together. **

 Buffy rested her forehead against her knees. <Not even for Angel.> Then she heard Giles' voice. ** I don't think I could lose you again, Buffy. ** She couldn't lose him again either. She could do this, survive this, with Giles. But when he was gone ...


   Giles paced the confines of his living area. Ethan had moved to the relative safety of the kitchen. The others sat on the sofa talking quietly. They threw out theories on how this could have happened. The door opened quietly and Buffy came in, her head bowed.

 Giles practically ran to her and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Buffy? Are you all right?"

 Buffy looked up and met his eyes. "I couldn't do it. Not to you. But I can't promise that after ... Well, that I won't."

 Giles nodded in understanding.

 "What do I do, Giles?" Buffy asked.