__Tension__
By Cordelia's Ghost



*March 18, 1997

This feeling of impending doom is steadily growing stronger. I have been Cordelia's Watcher for three months, and have already trained her for things that most of the world's population doesn't know exists: Vampires, succubae, zombies, and other various species of demons. These training sessions with Cordelia are very intense, and I admit that they are, in part, for selfish reasons. I want to be close to her, and close to the fire that drives her.

Our relationship is unusual at best. She is my charge--my pupil. She looks to me for instruction, to teach her how to slay the evil that exists in this town, and here I am filled with longing for her. It is with regret to say that we have become friends—very close friends. She tells me everything about school, her parents, and the people she called friends, but really, they are more like her sheep, bleating in agreement to everything she says. I find myself telling her things she really has no business knowing, such as the rather problematic relationship I have with Father. Yet, here I am, telling her these things, sending her these signals.

The signals Cordelia sends are undeniable, although they are not of a romantic persuasion. She has quickly let me know who is in charge. A look here, a comment there. Only in title am I her superior, and I'm not sure if she us just that obstinate or I that weak. She has even gone so far as to drag me around downtown Sunnydale (if such a thing actually exists) after sunset, under the guise of `honing her vampire-seeking skills'. I do not consider myself to be naïve, but I must confess that I was hoping that this excursion was her attempt at some sort of social contact with me. However, her true intention was revealed when she grabbed me by the arm and took me into Ralph Lauren and began piling shirts and pants into my arms. "Less tweed," she said. "And suits are for being buried at the cemetery, not patrolling it." She does have quite an eye for clothes, though, as these khaki pants are comfortable…

Anyway, as the weeks go by, it has become apparent she is content to flirt. We wait for vampires to rise, filling our time with conversations about everything and nothing, and everything she says is laden with innuendo. Several weeks ago, I was inches from holding her hand when a vampire surprised us from behind. Of course, Cordelia wasted no time in destroying him, but the combination of my close encounter and her excitement with the kill were almost too much for me to bear. That is when the dreams began. Not prophetic dreams, as Cordelia is inclined to sometimes have, but dreams I can't admit to in daylight. I fill these personal journals with them just to clear my mind. I keep them separate from the Watcher's Diaries, and also from Cordelia. It is the only thing I keep hidden from her.

After our nightly patrols, I force myself to sleep, and when sleep finally comes, all I can see is her beautiful face. I wake in the middle of the night drenched in sweat, my heart racing. I fear that as we draw closer, this condition will only become more aggravated.

It isn't just her beauty that mesmerizes me. It's her incredible zest for life, and the inner workings of her mind. It's the incredible high she gets from being the Slayer. It's her obsession with shopping. Her absolute resistance to face anything but reality and speak anything but truth is fascinating. I love everything about her. I love her. Period.

I often wonder if another Watcher has ever fallen in love with his Slayer. The diaries only document a few cases where parental love has developed, but even that was frowned upon. Watchers have been fired for caring too much.*

* * * * *

*March 19, 1997

What I have feared has come to pass. I went to the market this afternoon, and when I came home, I found Cordelia on the couch watching television. I only bought that blasted contraption for her, because I certainly have no use for it. She turned around and smiled at me. I returned her smile, my heart leaping like her faithful puppy.

As a side note, I'd like to add that I do realize that my exact recollection of this conversation borders on obsessive, but that very same quality is what they most admired at the Academy—my ability to recall even the most mundane detail.

Her smile is dazzling, and as she begins to speak, I realize that she wants something.

"Shouldn't you consider getting cable? There's nothing on the networks," she said to me, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

"Shouldn't you consider putting down the remote and picking up some books? You have a Chemistry test tomorrow." She flirts with me and the best I can do is sound like her father. I hate it when I sound like her father. Why couldn't I have said something clever? Something that would make her laugh.

She rolled her eyes at me, like she would her father, and cut off the television. She walked over to the kitchen where I was standing, concentrating on where to put the eggs, and the English muffins.

"I'm not worried about Chemistry. Honor roll, remember? Not only am I a super-slayer; I'm a super-student. Principal Snyder says so."

"It can never hurt to be prepared. I would think that after all the training, that particular point of interest would have sunk into that pretty little head of yours."

"Oh, I meant to let it sink in, but I was too busy fighting the forces of darkness."

"Is that all? I'm still reeling from your resignation from the cheerleading squad. Certainly the Sunnydale High Razorbacks will never be the same." This was the part I loved the most…the lightness of our conversations, when she plays along and I don't have to concentrate on my longing for her.

"Yeah, well, you're right, mister. They will never find someone who looks as cute as I do to put on top of that pyramid. Besides, do you know how many head cheerleaders there are in this world? Compare that to the number of slayers. You just don't get much more special than that."

Before I could respond, she was already speaking again.

"So…how late do you think we'll be tonight?"

"Depends on the vampire activity, why? Are the Cordettes assembling at the Bronze to decide what's in and what's out?"

"No…. but there's this guy…." She said, and my heart dropped to the floor, and a sudden wave of jealousy swept over me.

"A guy? Does he go to school with you? What do you know about him?"

"Whoa, Wes. He's just a guy."

"You should know better than anyone that there is almost no such thing as that in Sunnydale."

Cordelia arched one of her eyebrows and exhaled. "He's a senior, and President of Student Council. He's also pitches for the baseball team and is a straight-A student. His name is Jared, and we have a History class together."

"Now I see why you can't recall the facts of The Hundred Years War…" I knew that I should have said it, but I just couldn't help myself.

"Because we work together, I'm going to overlook that little piece of rudeness."

Because we work together. She may as well drive a stake into my heart.

"I don't trust him, Cordelia. Have you never heard of something being too good to be true?"

"What, do you think I would go out with someone I don't know anything about? Sunnydale is a small town, Wes, and I know everyone in it. So trust me when I say that Jared is very date-worthy."

"There are other risks involved in seeing this boy that you may not see. He is a walking target, having this attachment to you."

"What about my friends? They haven't been put in any real danger."

"I would hardly call those people you associate with friends." I knew I was being hard on her, but I couldn't stop.

"Geez, Wesley, lay off, huh? What's got your knickers in a twist?"

"My knickers are not in a twist. I just want you to be safe, and I don't want you putting innocent lives in danger. If you have to look out for others, then you're not concentrating on fighting."

"Well I certainly don't plan on taking him on patrol with me."

And thus I lost the battle. In resignation I told her, "Maybe we should go ahead and get our things collected. I don't want to keep you out too late."

She grinned and giggled.

"Thanks, Wesley! You're the best!" She hugged me and I felt my heart begin to beat erratically.

"I only want you to get home early so that you can study for your exams in the morning."

"Sure, whatever you say," knowing that she had won.*

* * * * *

The science classroom was dark and empty. A dark figure appeared in the doorway and glanced at the clock, seeing that he had three hours until the teachers came, which would be plenty of time to complete his task. He cleared out a space on the floor and opened his book bag. He withdrew a book and opened it to a marked page in the middle. He took the supplies that he would need from his book bag as well, and set them on a nearby desk.

The oil was first. He walked in a circle, pouring the sacred oil so that he was enclosed in the circle. He took a deep breath and began to speak.

"Sema, goddess of fruitfulness, look down upon your lowly servant. Look down upon the one who has called upon your name, begging you once again for your favor."

He struck a match and lit the oil that surrounded him on fire. He continued his incantation.

"Hear me, Sema," he stated with growing confidence. "Hear me and make me more than I am. Make me what I want to be; make me stand out from the herd and a tower of strength among the lower beings."

The smoke began to billow up towards the ceiling. He paid no attention and took a knife from his back pocket, making a slice across the palm of his hand, letting his blood drop into the fire, his voice getting stronger and louder.

"Accept this offering that I bring. Accept this offering and honor my request. Sema, if you accept me, fill me and extinguish what I have built!"

The fired raged at his words, and the smoke began to surround him, and covered his face like a mask. He began to breathe deeply, taking the smoke into his body. After inhaling deeply several times, there was a flash of light and the smoke and fire were gone, leaving no trace behind it.

* * * * *

Cordelia stepped out of her car, and began walking toward the school. For the first time in three months, she was glad the vampire activity was light, so she could spend some time away from Wesley. He was a cloud of gloom and doom last night.

*Can you imagine? Someone like Wesley being jealous of a high school senior.*

She knew that Wesley had feelings for her. And Cordelia couldn't deny that he gave her the warm fuzzies, too, but she was 16 and he was 27. Did he expect her to not date for the rest of her high school career just because they had some chemistry? Unlikely story. He may have put his love life on hold, but she wasn't going to.

As she walked into the classroom, she saw that Jared was already at their lab station. She was glad she had only told Wesley about Jared being in her Psych class. He would have really flipped if he found out Jared was her lab partner, too. She sat down beside him, and saw that he was engrossed in some major studying, and had a bandage over his hand.

"So, Jared, do you think we should look at the periodic table… what happened to your hand?"

He grunted something about burning his hand on the iron this morning.

"Housework related injuries must be right up there with dentist suicides. This is why I let the maid do all of my ironing. Anyway, I had a great time at the Bronze last night. Maybe we could do it again tonight?"

Jared lifted his head. His eyes were bloodshot.

"Oh, my gosh! Jared! Did you sleep at all last night?"

He shook his head no.

"You were studying?"

He nodded.

"Do you think it's smart to skip sleep before a test?"

He expression went from blank to rage.

"I don't care what you think is smart, Cordelia!" He hissed at her.

She straightened her posture and looked him in his eyes.

"If you think you can get away with speaking to me in that tone, think again! You are totally off my list."

"Oh, consider me heartbroken, Cordy. Now, if you don't mind, I have something real to concentrate on." He turned back to his scribbling until the teacher walked into the classroom.

"Clear your lab stations, please. I'll begin passing out the test, and you may get started when every team has a booklet. You will find that your cabinets are stocked with everything you'll need to complete the test, along with instructions for turning your completed mixtures in to me."

When the teacher had passed out all the booklets, Cordelia opened it and began collecting ingredients for their first mixture. Before she could begin combining the ingredients, Jared snatched the booklet away from her.

"Excuse me! I was working on that!"

"Why don't you let someone who knows what he's doing make these mixtures?"

"Hello? Team effort ring a bell?"

"Well, I'll have to make up for your half of the team. Why don't you just sit there and look pretty? That's your specialty, right?"

"What's wrong with you? We should work on these together!" Jared lunged at Cordelia, knocking over several containers of fluid in the process. Jared screamed, making the teacher and the other students look up.

"Look what you've done, you idiot! That's half our grade spilling on the floor! God, Cordelia, how on earth did I get stuck with you?" His eyes grew redder as he screamed. His breathing became staggered, and blood trickled from his nose and mouth. He collapsed on the floor.

The teacher ran over to Jared, and checked for a pulse.

"He's still breathing. Someone call 911, quickly!"

Cordelia was already on her cell phone.

"An ambulance will be here in 5 minutes."

* * * * *

Cordelia stood at the door of Wesley's apartment. The door was closed, and she had a key, but she didn't want to use it. She didn't want to hear what Wesley had to say when she told him about Jared's episode in Chemistry. But she needed to know what had happened to him, and she felt sure Wesley was the only one who could tell her.

She slid the key into the lock and opened the door. Wesley was seated on the couch, writing in a journal. She stood in the doorway, waiting for him to acknowledge her, but he was too engrossed in his writing to notice her.

"Wesley." He jumped at the sound of her voice and slammed his journal shut. He stood up and faced her.

"Cordelia, you startled me."

"I can see that. Must've been a pretty important something you were writing in that journal for you to want it closed so quickly."

"No, I…was just recounting our patrol last night."

Cordelia didn't believe him, but she was willing to let it slide. "Wes, I don't care what you write about in your little Watcher Diaries, because I know I do good work. Besides, I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here about Jared."

Wesley's face tightened at the sound of his name. He took his glasses off and began rubbing them with a handkerchief, as she closed the door behind her and sat in a chair.

"I'm not sure how I can help you."

"Well, this is going to be music to your ears, I'm sure, but Jared had a complete and total brain misfire today."

"Well, I hate to say I told you so, but..." Wesley's face lit up just a little, but enough for Cordelia to notice.

"You're kidding, right? Don't start that crap with me; it could have been anyone. Listen, he wigged today in Chemistry when we started our test. But that doesn't make him evil."

Wesley stopped rubbing his glasses and placed them back on his face. "I thought you took History with him."

"Well, Chemistry, too. He's my lab partner." She averted eye contact with him.

"You didn't think enough of me to tell me the truth?" The tone in his voice smacked of disappointment. It made her stomach hurt. She decided to take the defensive anyway.

"Because I knew you'd act this way. Why are you so jealous of him?"

Wesley coughed and stuttered.

"I… I… I am most certainly not jealous of a…a…a high school boy. Why on earth…"

"Because you're acting like a 10 year old. Why don't you just pee around me and mark your territory?" Cordelia stood up, her anger burning inside her.

"How absurd. I'm only thinking of your safety."

"Is that what you keep telling yourself?"

"I don't see how you would think anything else."

"I don't see how I couldn't."

He was stumped. He had no other arguments. Cordelia had him dead to rights. She could read him so easily. He decided the best plan of action was to avoid the subject altogether.

"Why don't you begin by telling me everything that lead up to his episode, and describe the episode itself? I'll see what I can find." He sat down at his desk, and began to write in his Watcher's Diary as she spoke. Wesley finished writing, and looked up at Cordelia. "Well, this definitely sounds mystical. It's vaguely familiar, but I'll have to do some research."

She had a very worried look on her face. She began to bite her bottom lip.

"Wesley, do you think he's not human? If he's been possessed by some sort of demon out to get me, I'm going to kill him."

Wesley was taken back by her choice of words. He expected her to feel some grief for her friend, not rage. Obviously, Cordelia's infatuation hadn't clouded the love she had for her own life.

"You need to be cautious, because in all likelihood he could be a demon of some sort, or someone may have cast a spell on him to influence his actions."

Cordelia sighed. "I guess I'm off to baseball practice. Maybe his friends know something."

She turned her back to him, and began collecting the things she had so carelessly discarded just minutes before.

"I'll just stay here, and begin my research." He looked away from her and down at his desk. "I'll call you if I find anything."

Cordelia turned to him and smiled.

"Thanks, Wes. It means a lot," she said as she slid her purse over her shoulder.

*Not enough, apparently*, he thought as he watched her close the door behind her.

* * * * *

It was a beautiful, sunny afternoon, as Cordelia walked onto the baseball field. Some of the players called out to Cordelia and she waved, but kept walking towards the dugout. One of them noticed her and called her over.

"Hey, Cordy. Quite a surprise to see you out here."

"Well, Michael, this is where I knew you'd be. Can we take a walk?"

"Sure," Michael said with a laugh. "Just don't let Jared know. His fist in my face is not a thought I'd like to entertain."

Cordelia laughed with him and then turned, letting Michael catch up to her.

"Actually, Michael, I was hoping that we could talk about Jared."

"Umm, OK..." he said with hesitance.

"I guess you heard about what happened to Jared today."

"Yeah, the coach told us he went to the hospital. Have you been by to see him?"

Cordelia looked down at her shoes. "Not really. A lot of his outburst was directed at me. I was hoping you could tell me what's going on with him. He was just fine at The Bronze last night."

Michael smiled, but Cordelia didn't like it. "Last few days, his game's been off. And the coach is on him about his grades. Threatened to take him off the team."

He paused, then leaned close to Cordelia and whispered, "But you didn't hear any of that from me, OK? If you guys are having problems, you should go to him."

"Actually, this helps a lot. Maybe I'll be able to talk to him now."

"Listen, I've got to get back to practice. But Cordy, if this thing with him doesn't work out, give me a call." He winked at her as he walked away.

Cordelia turned and began walking in the other direction. She made a face.

"No thanks, I am so done with jocks."

* * * * *

Cordelia was sitting at a table in the school library when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned to see Wesley standing to her left.

"One of the teachers said she saw you walk in here," Wesley said with a hint of apology in his voice.

"So much for that `state-of-the-art' security system the principal had installed," Cordelia said sarcastically.

Wesley heard the sarcasm in her voice and responded with similar bite. "I wouldn't be here, but you won't answer your phone. Too busy mingling with the elite?"

Cordelia's eyes narrowed. "I turned it off. As you can see, I'm attempting to study for a history test tomorrow." She was suddenly aware of how annoyed she was by his being there.

Wesley sat down beside her and closed the book she had been studying. "Cordelia, I realize that you are upset with what has happened to your friend, but we still have a job to do. Unfortunately, we do not get the luxury of shutting down when things get bad."

She turned to him and whispered venomously, "You mean I don't get the luxury of shutting down. You mean I still have a job to do. You can quit anytime you want. I, on the other hand, get no such choice." She paused, then added, "I haven't shut down. I just wanted to study."

Before Wesley could reply, a woman cleared her throat behind them. They turned to see the librarian staring at them and pointing her finger to the exit. Cordelia rolled her eyes and exhaled; all while collecting her purse and book. When she walked out the door, Wesley followed her.

"Way to get us kicked out of the library, Captain Quiet," Cordelia said as soon as they were in the hallway of the school.

"We wouldn't have gotten kicked out if you hadn't cut your phone off. And why would you go to the library when you should have been questioning the baseball players like you said you were?"

"I did question them. I just wanted…. I just wanted to spend some time alone."

Wesley looked as if she had just slapped him in the face, but she didn't see any point in lying to him. She sighed and took him by the arm.

"Let's take a walk."

* * * * *

The sun began its descent in the sky as Cordelia and Wesley walked down the sidewalk away from Sunnydale High School. For a while, neither of them spoke, but suddenly they both spoke at once, as if the silence was too much for them to bear.

"Wesley…"

"Cordelia…"

They stopped walking to face one another.

Cordelia started gently. "Wesley, I know how you feel about me. It's been pretty obvious from the day we met. But Wes, I don't… I don'twant to hurt you."

She tried to smile, to let him know everything was going to be all right, but all she could find in her heart for him was pity. She reached out and touched his cheek.

"You don't deserve to go through this, especially over some silly high school girl like me."

"Cordelia, I don't think you're silly at all."

"But I am. I'm only interested in cars and money and popularity," she told him. "You need to find someone who likes peace and quiet and talking about books. You don't want me. You just think you do."

Wesley stood there, his jaw becoming more and more rigid. He reached up and removed her hand from his cheek.

"I see," he said as his posture straightened. "Well, then, I guess that gives me a new perspective, doesn't it? Please tell me what you found out at the baseball field today."

Cordelia stood there, looking at Wesley in disbelief. "Wes, if you want to talk about this…"

"I believe everything that needs to be said has already been said. Shall we get back to work?"

"Um, OK. I, uh, spoke to one of Jared's friends, Michael. He said that his grades were down, and that his `game was off', whatever that means. He also said the coach was threatening to throw Jared off the team if things didn't improve."

"Interesting," Wesley said as he turned and began walking.

"What? What's interesting?" Cordelia asked when she caught up with him.

"Yesterday you told me that this boy was a straight-A student, but his teammates seem to have a different story. What do you think that means?"

"I think it means that Jared's been putting up this façade just to impress me." Cordelia stated matter-of-factly.

"Or," Wesley began, "It could mean that Jared's been attempting to impress everyone around him, which falls right in line with what I've found. My research indicates that, according to the transformation he underwent, he may have performed an augmentation spell. Cordelia — I want you to go to the hospital and talk to him. In his vulnerable state, he may be more adept at opening up to you."

"Sure, like in Chemistry this morning. I felt like he wanted to open me up instead of open up to me."

"Pride is a curious thing, Cordelia, especially in men."

"So I've noticed," she said with the raise of one of her eyebrows.

* * * * *

Most people hated hospitals, but not Cordelia. In fact, she felt rather ambivalent about them. Over the past few years, Cordelia had spent a good bit of time visiting her mother in hospitals much nicer than Sunnydale General. When she was much younger, and her mother was first admitted following one of her `attacks', Cordelia was frightened by the doctors and the cold, sterile environment. Eventually, hospitals became commonplace to Cordelia, and being in them had no effect on her whatsoever, and she looked on the people who worked there as just another branch of wait staff, ready to be at her side should she need them.

Cordelia was at Sunnydale General today, meaning that the staff here was too busy dealing with Hellmouth-related emergencies to notice her as she walked in the hospital lobby. She walked to the reception desk and sighed heavily when she saw that no one was there to assist her. Cordelia looked around to make sure she was still unnoticed, reached over the top of the desk and retrieved the list of patient room numbers. She quickly found Jared's name and placed the list where she had found it, and started for the elevator, laughing to herself.

*Serves Jared right that he's in the children's ward. Maybe he'll think before yelling at me again.*

She stepped off the elevator and into the bright, cheerful hall. She smiled as she made her way down the hall and to Jared's room, enjoying the obvious humiliation that Jared was suffering.

*It's all about karma, baby. What goes around comes around.*

She knocked on the door and got no response, and saw no harm in opening the door slightly, just to get a peek. When she saw that he was alone and sleeping, Cordelia slid in the door quietly.

Jared didn't look at all like himself lying there in the hospital bed. He looked like a kid, not the popular and athletic baseball star people saw on campus. He had an IV dripping some clear liquid into his veins, but Cordelia had no idea what for.

*Where is everyone? Why aren't his parents here? Why is this room so empty?*

And the room was empty. She didn't see so much as a toothbrush or comb or any clothes at all. Cordelia sat in a chair nearby and decided to wait until someone came in to tell her what was going on, or until Jared himself woke up, whichever came first.

Somewhere in between waiting and complete boredom without so much as a magazine to read, Cordelia fell asleep in the chair. The sound of a door opening woke her up, and she wiped her eyes and stood up to see who was entering.

"Hello…" said the figure in the doorway. Cordelia's eyes were still a little bleary from her nap, but she could tell from the voice that whoever was in the room was female.

"Hi, I'm Cordelia. A friend of Jared's." Cordelia blinked hard and looked at her watch. She had been asleep for almost an hour. "I must have fallen asleep waiting."

"And who were you waiting for, exactly?" Now that Cordelia's eyes had found their focus, she could see the figure that had been talking. Definitely female, bearing a slight resemblance to Jared, and holding what looked like an overnight bag.

"Well, actually, anyone who could tell me what's going on with him. No one's talking at school, and I was really worried about him." Cordelia put on her sweetest smile for the woman.

The woman returned her smile. "How sweet. You are the first of Jared's friends to come by." She looked over at the boy lying in the bed and back at Cordelia. She had tears in her eyes. "How rude of me to not introduce myself. I'm Sylvia, Jared's mother."

"It's great to meet you, Sylvia." Cordelia paused as the woman nodded her head in acceptance of her, then added, "So, what have the doctors said?"

Sylvia closed the door behind her and sat the bag she had been carrying on the counter by the sink. She looked very tired. "The doctors haven't pinpointed why he bled, exactly. They can't find the source, but they think it might be related to stress. They were able to get him to sleep by injecting him with a rather large dose of a sedative. Now they've got him on a steady diet of it." She nodded toward the bag hooked up to his arm, and continued. "I was told that you called the ambulance."

"Jared's my lab partner in Chemistry. It was really scary to see him that way, you know? I've never seen him mad, ever."

Sylvia sighed again. "That sounds like him. Always concerned about what others thought about him."

"I don't mean to pry, but was he acting strangely at home last night? I saw him at the Bronze, and he was just fine."

"I didn't see him last night," she said mournfully. "He told me yesterday morning that after baseball practice yesterday, he was going to the Bronze and then staying over at Michael's."

"Well, maybe Michael will stop by soon and give the doctors something to work with." Cordelia looked out the window and saw the sun setting. She would need to patrol soon. She turned back to Jared's mother. "It was nice meeting you, Sylvia, but I have to go. Maybe I'll see you soon, OK?"

Sylvia nodded and Cordelia left the hospital room, heading for the nearest cemetery.

* * * * *

Cordelia was antsy from meeting Jared's mother. She didn't like that Michael didn't mention that Jared stayed with him last night. She was beginning to dislike Michael completely. In fact, ever since she'd become the Slayer, she found herself disliking most of her crowd. She guessed it was the constant exposure to death that did it to her.

The cemetery was cool and the breeze was light as she walked through, stake in hand, ready for the first vampire that dared cross her path. Cordelia's ears picked up a slight sound and she stopped.

"You know, if you're going to try and bite me, there's really no point in hiding. Just come on out and do it, already," she said with an air of annoyance in her voice as she turned around.

Then, from behind one of the many crypts, he stepped out. He was her height and looked her age, and though he looked human, Cordelia could feel the demon inside him, and he was hungry. He didn't look familiar to her, so she knew he had to have been vamped for a few years.

"You're quite a brave girl."

"Well, what can I say? I like to take chances."

The vampire walked closer to her, but Cordelia didn't move. She was ready for him, ready for the fight. But he wasn't aggressive in his walk toward her; it was almost friendly.

"Well, what can I say? I've always had a thing for strong women," he said with a smirk. "And you've got strength all over you. I can smell it."

Cordelia shot him a look full of ice. "I'm not impressed by guys who skulk around in graveyards."

Again, he smiled at her. "That's because you haven't given me the chance to impress you. Tell me, what's your name?"

She arched one of her eyebrows. "You don't already know who I am?"

"How can I when you won't tell me?" He inched closer to her, and whispered, "If you let me, I can make you even stronger."

Cordelia whispered back, "I highly doubt that," and punched him in the face, sending him falling backward.

"What the…" the look of shock on his face was priceless.

"Please don't tell me you still don't know who I am." She squared off, ready to fight, to really fight. She didn't understand why these vampires liked to banter so much.

His face morphed into the demon as he jumped off of the ground and charged her.

"Slayer," he growled as he grabbed her and forced her to the ground, knocking the stake out of her hand. He had her arms pinned down, and when he tried to bite her, she delivered a quick knee to his groin and he fell over with pain. Cordelia jumped to her feet and walked over to where the vampire was laying on the ground and roughly pulled him to his feet by the collar of his jacket.

"Oh, you think you're so tough, don't you?" Cordelia asked, her hand still grasping his collar. She punched him in the face and it feel good. Better than it had ever felt before. So she kept punching him. "Just looking for some chick to come strolling through the cemetery." His lips and nose were bleeding, and one of his eyes had begun to swell. "Or maybe you thought you'd get lucky and find a nice couple to molest. Well guess what buddy? You got me instead!" She let go of his collar and he fell to the ground. She scanned the area near her and picked up her stake.

"Don't tell me you don't have any fight left in you." She put a hand on her hip to emphasize her disgust.

But the vampire just sat on the ground, staring at Cordelia, who sighed heavily.

"Well, if you're done for tonight, I'll just finish this." She snatched him up by his collar again and pulled her arm back to stake him when the vampire punched her in the stomach.

"Oh, I think I've got a little fight left in me," he said as he grabbed the arm that was holding his collar and began to twist and push her back, forcing her to let go of his jacket. "I've had quite enough of your abuse of my jacket."

"I've had quite enough of you," Cordelia said, delivering a kick to his stomach and sending him back a few feet. As he attempted to gain his balance, she plunged the wooden stake into his heart, and he exploded into dust. Cordelia shook his remains off her shirt and went home to change. She had to get to the Bronze.

* * * * *

The Bronze was crowded. Students, on overload from the onslaught of tests, had apparently decided, en masse, that The Bronze was the place to be tonight. Cordelia, in no mood for flirting, but in every mood for getting answers, decided that wearing something that said `I'm not a nice girl' was the way to get the answers she wanted. After squeezing in the door, she made her way to the bar and ordered a diet soda. While waiting, she began to look for Michael. As the bartender handed her the glass, she spotted him.

Michael was in a booth with Harmony, Aura, and some of their friends. Cordelia caught his eye and he gave her a rather lascivious look as she walked toward them. She just arched her eyebrow and kept her pace until she was in front of them.

"Hey, beautiful," Michael said as he slid over to make room for Cordelia. "I wondered where you were."

Cordelia sat down beside Michael, with Harmony and Aura glaring at her as if she had just told them their credit cards were maxed out.

"What? Have I grown a third eye?" Cordelia asked with a smile.

"No," Harmony said with a disgusted, know-it-all sigh to cover her lie. "We just didn't know where you were, either."

"I didn't realize that you two had such a yen for keeping tabs," Cordy said dryly.

Aura took a sip from her drink and smiled. "As if. I know how much you like to make an entrance."

"And what an entrance it was." Michael said as he draped his arm around Cordelia's shoulder.

"I'm certainly glad to see some people still appreciate hard work," she said pointedly at Harmony and Aura, then turned to Michael and smiled.

He smiled back at her, and his hand that had been draped over her began making small circles on her bare shoulder. "You're being modest. It doesn't take much to make you look this gorgeous."

"I thought I'd try it on for size. See how it feels to be humble," Cordelia said with a flirtatious smile. He was making her sick, but she wouldn't let on for a moment. She sat and looked at him for a moment, listening to the music. "Oh—I love this song. You wanna dance?"

"I'd love to."

Cordelia slid out of the booth, stood up and smiled at the others at the table, and extended her hands to Michael. He took them and she led him to the dance floor. As they danced, he placed his hands on her hips and she began lightly brushing the back of his neck with her fingers. Harmony and Aura looked on with disgust as the others stared at Cordelia's every movement.

"I hate her so much," Aura stated.

"Me, too," Harmony added, and then turned to Aura. "Why do we hate her?"

Aura rolled her eyes and sighed. "Because she does stuff like this," she made furious hand movements at Cordelia, "all the time."

"Oh," Harmony said, faking understanding. "Cause I was kinda thinking that we hang out with her because she attracts all the guys. And she throws great parties."

"Shut up, Harmony."

Back at the dance floor, Cordelia had begun dancing closely to Michael, neither of them speaking. Finally, he broke the silence.

"I'm glad you came tonight," he said softly.

"I wasn't sure if I was going to. I think my teachers are out to get me, with all the tests they've been giving," she said with a slight laugh.

"They have been piling it on lately, haven't they?" He paused, kissing her on the forehead. "Let's not talk about school. We spend enough time there in the daytime. We shouldn't let it take over our nights, too."

Cordelia sighed. "You're right. I'm just so stressed out, I can't seem to think of anything else."

"I know just the thing to take your mind off things. Let's go." Michael stopped dancing, took Cordelia's hand and led her out of the club.

Aura and Harmony witnessed this, and Aura said, "I really hate her."

"Me, too," Harmony said, and added, "But mostly, I'm just jealous."

Aura sighed. "Me, too," and took a long sip from her drink.

* * * * *

Wesley sat at Willy's Bar drinking his second glass of scotch, wishing there were more places to drink than this particular pub. The Bronze was full of students, most notably Cordelia, who was probably there dancing the night away with her friends. There was also a bar near the college campus, but it was too far to drive just to drink, and he didn't want to be anyplace where there would be frivolity of any kind. Willy's was depressing enough, so it would have to do.

He certainly couldn't drink at home, mainly because he didn't want anything to remind him of Cordelia. He had been at the apartment briefly, but only long enough to change out of the shirt and pants that she had bought him, and into one of his suits.

*Why did I let her buy me these things? I can afford them on my salary? Why was I so eager to let her change me?*

It was time to go back to being her Watcher, instead of pretending that he was one of her suitors.

An ache began to creep its way into the back of Wesley's head as he thought about the predicament he had gotten himself into.

*Diving headfirst again into emotions that aren't reciprocated, Wesley. Good show.*

He drank the rest of his glass to dull the pain and removed his eyeglasses as he motioned for Willy to bring him another scotch.

*She said that she didn't want to hurt me. If she didn't want to hurt me, she should have kept up the charade.*

He sighed heavily and rubbed his eyes.

*But of all people, I should have known that Cordelia does not play games.*

Willy sat the glass down in front of Wesley, who began to nurse it immediately. He had closed his eyes for a moment when a vaguely familiar voice began speaking to him.

"Wow. Time certainly changes people, doesn't it? Never marked you for a drinker."

He turned to his left to see the rather blurred outline of a woman.

"Do I know you?" He was in absolutely no mood for pleasantries.

"I would hope so," the blurry outline of a woman said, touching his arm. "Because I remember everything about you. Every freckle, every scar."

Wesley squinted as he put his drink down and placed his glasses back on his face. When the figure came into focus, the familiarity of her voice finally jogged his memory.

"Miranda?"

"Bravo, Wesley," she said, leaning on the bar beside him.

"What are you doing in Sunnydale?"

Miranda tilted her head sideways and squinted at Wesley. "This is no way to treat an ex-girlfriend."

Wesley took another drink, looking at Miranda through the corner of his eye. "Please forgive me for not sweeping you off your feet. I've had a rough day."

She shrugged. "I'm sorry about that. Listen, I'll go and let you stew over whatever it is that's got you in such a twist. Besides, I'll see you soon enough, and I'll see Cordelia tomorrow." She stood up straight again and took a step towards walking away, but Wesley had reached out and touched her shoulder.

"What do you mean `you'll see Cordelia tomorrow'?"

"I'm the new librarian at the high school. I'm sure Cordelia will be in there sometime tomorrow."

Wesley smirked drunkenly. "You don't know Cordelia very well."

"No, I guess I don't. But I hope to soon." Miranda smiled again.

"I don't understand—I'm her Watcher. Did the Council send you to check up on me?"

Miranda laughed. "Heavens, no. I got so twitchy in England. I had no idea how bored I could be at Council Headquarters. Do you realize they placed me in the Hall of Records? I did nothing all day and wait for Quentin or someone to call and ask for some obscure something."

Wesley smiled at her. "And what do you think you'll be doing at Sunnydale High School?"

"Well, I don't know, but I'm sure it's got to be more interesting that Quentin calling me and asking me to look up the anniversary for the Feast of St. Vigeous. Besides, I think you and I could have lots of good times together, like we did before you graduated the Academy."

Wesley sat quietly for a moment, thinking. He looked at his drink, and then looked at Miranda again.

"Have you found a place to stay?"

"I'm still in the market," she paused for effect, then continued. "Do you want me to drive you home?"

Wesley nodded and out of nowhere, Willy was placing his keys in Miranda's hand.

* * * * *

Michael flipped his car lights off as they turned into the driveway so he wouldn't arouse the suspicions of his sleeping parents. Cordelia waited for him to open the passenger side door, and together they silently made their way up the stairs to Michael's bedroom. When he had closed the door, he wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her, and they slowly made their way towards the bed. They kissed a little while longer, until Cordelia shot straight up on the bed.

"What's the matter?" Michael asked irritably.

"I… uh… oh, this is embarrassing. I need to go to the bathroom."

Michael sat up beside her and laughed, pointing to a door in his left wall. Cordelia slid off the bed and faced Michael and smiled.

"Don't move a muscle. I'll be right back."

She closed the bathroom door behind her and thought, *Geez! How much longer do I have to deal with this scuzbucket? The things I do for my calling.*

She immediately set to her task, looking around in his bathroom, cabinets, finding some evidence that maybe Jared had been there the night before. However, all she found was shaving cream, soap and some magazines that she was sure Michael's mother wouldn't approve of. She was about to open the bathroom door when she suddenly remembered to flush the toilet, so Michael wouldn't think she was a disgusting pig and withhold information.

Cordelia walked out of Michael's bathroom to find him sitting on the edge of his bed.

"I know what your problem is," he said in a very self-assured manner. Cordelia put her hands on her hips and was about to respond when he cut her off. "You're nervous about being here, and maybe a little guilty about cheating on Jared."

"I'm not cheating on Jared. We were never dating," Cordelia said, her defenses up.

"Let me ask you this. Would you be here with me if Jared were awake?" Cordelia was silent, so Michael continued, this time softly. "But listen, Cordy, you don't need to worry about any of that."

"And why is that?" Cordelia asked, her suspicions spiking.

Michael smiled confidently. "Well, let's just say that the doctors probably won't be able to find out what's wrong with Jared."

Cordelia panicked. "Why not?" she asked.

Michael laughed quietly, and then he looked at Cordelia. "Because they'll never suspect magic is the cause of his coma."

She felt the flames build up in her chest. `He's in a coma? And it's because of magic? Why?"

"Jared knows that I dabble in magic, and when his grades started to slip, he asked me for a spell to augment his mind."

"And you were more than happy to oblige him. Can you please tell me why you've confided this to me?"

"Because I want you to see how much I want you to be with me. You don't deserve someone like Jared. He's a loser. Can't perform under pressure. You need someone who can remain clam, who doesn't mind when the stakes are high."

"So you gave him a spell that would put him in a coma?"

"No," he laughed. "I gave the perfect spell. His problem was that he got nervous, his voice was probably shaking or something. If you don't follow it to the letter—"

[Smack!]

Before Michael could finish his sentence, and before she knew what she was doing, Cordelia found her right fist connecting with his jaw.

"What the… hell's the matter with you?"

"I just thought..." Michael began, rubbing his jaw.

[Smack!]

She had punched him again. "I am so sick and tired of people telling me what they think is best for me! I am able to make my own decisions, thank you very much."

Cordelia pinned Michael to the bed, and began to interrogate him.

"Now tell me, how can the spell be reversed?"

"Get off me!"

[Smack!]

She punched him again, his mouth beginning to bleed. She heard herself screaming at him. "Doesn't feel so good, does it? Have you even seen how he looks in that hospital bed? His mother is a wreck, she's afraid she's going to lose her only son!"

Cordelia heard footsteps, and knew she had to act fast. She put her knee in his groin, and applied pressure. "Now tell me, how can I can reverse it?!"

Michael was groaning in pain. "It's in the book… in the top of the nightstand. It's on the opposite page of `The Prayer to Sema'."

Cordelia hopped off of him and grabbed the book out of the drawer just as his bedroom door was opening.

"What's going on in here?" Michael's father asked.

Cordelia wheeled around and assessed the damage she had done. She walked up to them and said calmly, "Maybe you should have a chat with your son about respecting a woman's wishes."

She was down the hall and out the front door, running at top speed to Wesley's.

* * * * *

Cordelia had to bang on the door and call his name twice before Wesley answered. She didn't have her key because it was in her purse, and she hadn't carried her purse to the Bronze.

When he did answer the door, he was quite disheveled, wearing a t-shirt and boxers. He had managed to put his glasses on correctly.

"What happened to you?" She asked, inviting herself in. She sniffed and looked at Wesley. "Have you been drinking?"

"What I do on my time is not your concern, Cordelia. Why are you here?" He answered her roughly.

"I found out why Jared passed out in class. Apparently, Michael thought if he could get Jared out of the way, I'd be free for the taking. Wesley, are you listening to me?"

Wesley had his body turned towards Cordelia, but his head kept glancing back toward his bedroom.

"Yes, of course I am."

"Well act like it, OK? Listen, I don't know how this whole magic thing works, so you've got to do the counterspell."

"How do you know you have all the ingredients? And how do you know it will even work?"

"I don't know. But I figured, you're the mojo man. I'm sure you could figure it out, and who is that skank standing in your bedroom doorway?"

Cordelia was gawking at Miranda, who was wearing one of Wesley's bedsheets for a dress.

"Cordelia, this is…" Wesley trailed off, at a loss for words.

"I'm Miranda, a friend of Wesley's from England."

"Wow, Wes. You certainly didn't waste any time when I told you to find someone you had something in common with. What'd you do? Call her after our little talk this afternoon?"

*So this is what jealousy feels like,* Cordelia said to herself.

"Actually, I found Wesley."

Cordelia felt the venom rise in her veins. "I don't remember asking you anything, Miranda."

Wesley stepped toward Cordelia. "Cordelia, calm down."

Cordelia jerked away from Wesley. "I am calm. Trust me, if I wasn't, Little Miss Bedsheets over there would have already been on the business end of my fist."

Miranda gasped and went back into Wesley's bedroom, closing the door behind her. Wesley glared at Cordelia.

"What is wrong with you?"

"Me? I'm not the one who just had a sudden lifestyle change. Oh wait—yes I did. But I didn't go jump into bed with the first person I saw."

Wesley groaned and rubbed his eyes beneath his glasses. "We're going to have to discuss this tomorrow, after we've both had some rest, and time to cool down."

"Please be kind enough to spare me the sordid details."

Wesley took the book from her. "Let's go into the kitchen and see if I have everything we need to reverse Jared's spell."

"Fine," Cordelia said, not moving from where she was standing.

"Then let's go," Wesley countered, who was not moving either.

"After you. I want to make sure you don't go running back to her the minute my back is turned."

Wesley sighed. "I assure you, that will not happen. Now, can we please finish this?"

"Gladly. Now go on."

He sighed and headed for the kitchen.

* * *