__Nature's Sole Mistake__
By Clarrie

OPENING – SUNNYDALE HIGH LIBRARY – MORNING.

Giles is organising documents or something, Wesley
appears to be labelling new text books. Alice sits at
a table gazing out of the window. She watches as
Willow comforts Buffy who is clutching a note, it is
creased and worn as something that has been carried
around for months – Buffy has her 'Oh what shall I do
now Angel has left me' face on.

Alice : (voice-over) Youth, with it's every sense
heightened to the edge of tolerance, every emotion
fresh, every experience a shower of discovery.
Foolish humanity, we idolise youth for it's beauty,
it's strength, blinding ourselves to the furnace of
joyous pain in which even the most stable of souls is
fired.
She will learn, in time, that there is nothing new
under the stars. That even her story has been played
out a thousand times or more, That she is not the
first girl to have stood under the night sky and
declared 'But I *am* Heathcliffe.'
Nor will she be the last.
But she will learn.
(in a much less serious voice, as if distracted by
something off camera. ) Ooh tea!

CREDIT SEQUENCE.

THE MIDDLE EAST : EDWADIAN ERA.

A young girl in traditional Arab dress is fighting
with a creature of the night. She appears to be
winning which indicates that she's probably the
Slayer. Close by stands an older man in a dusty white
linen suit, he holds a large crucifix and a dusty
book. He might as well have a badge with WATCHER
written on it.
The young girl beats the creature into submission and
it falls to the ground dead. She pauses for breath and
glances towards the man for reassurance.

Watcher: Good work Fatima. I believe that if we…

He is interrupted by a large demon which leaps out of
the shadow towards him, knocking him to the floor.

Demon: (angrily) WA-A-ATCHE-E-R !!!

A slightly older woman jumps out. She wears the
clothing of an Edwardian Englishwoman, ie. Floor
length skirt in a heavy tweedy material, jacket of the
same cloth, oh, and a sword.
She plunges the sword into the demon's back and twists
it round, he slumps over , dead.

English woman : Torquil? Are you alright down there?
Speak.

Torquil: (mumbles, holds hand out from around edge of
demon)

Fatima: Is he hurt?

The woman pulls the Watcher out from under the corpse.


Lady : Torquil? How are you, come on you great useless
lump. (she holds up her hand) How many fingers?

Fatima : (giggling) Missy Giles! He is your brother!

Mrs Giles: And a very fine distraction he makes too.
(wipes the flat edges of her sword on her skirt)
Fatima, pick up the crucifix for your Watcher please
dear.

Fatima picks up the book, the crucifix and the
Watchers spectacles from the ground and hands them to
her slightly stunned Watcher.

Mrs Giles : Dear me, I was supposed to meet Charles
for dinner at eight. Torquil, do you think you can
escort Fatima back to the house?

Torquil: I'm not entirely useless you know.

Mrs Giles: (turning away with a smile) A matter for
debate.

Fatima: (standing with Torquil and giggling) You a bad
lady Missy Giles!

CUT TO THE LIBRARY SUNNYDALE HIGH.

Buffy and Giles are training, Giles is clad in much
padding, a helmet, and more padding along his arms.
Buffy has a staff.

Buffy: (swinging the staff, using her cry to add to
the momentum of her blow) BAD!

Giles : (Ducking and blocking the blow with his fore
arm) Yes! Use your emotion.

Buffy:(swinging the staff once again) BAD!

Giles: (ducking and swerving as the staff hits him)
Good girl Buffy!

Buffy: (Her blows begin to increase in ferocity,
accompanied by a rise in volume of her
shouts) BAD!

Giles: (winded by the blow and looking slightly
nervous) Yes, um, do you think…

Buffy: BAD! (hit) BAD! (hit) BAD! (hit) BAD! (hit)
BAD!(hit)

Giles: (glasses askew and slightly winded) Yes, quite,
um, Buffy…

Buffy: (her blows becoming more rapid) BAD! (hit) BAD!
(hit) BAD! (hit) BAD! (hit)
BAD (hit) BAD (hit) BAD (hit) BAD (hit)

Giles: FOR GOD'S SAKE BUFFY I'M NOT A BLOODY VAMPIRE!

Buffy drops the staff and glares at him.

Giles: (standing up and rubbing his aching limbs) I-I
shouldn't have yelled. It, That is of
of course it can be easy for a Slayer to forget her
strength in the heat of… the library.

Buffy wipes her face and kicks her staff away. She
turns to a punching bag (one of the long cylindrical
sack types hung from the ceiling) and begins to pummel
it fiercely.

Giles: Buffy, I-I- realise that anger is, is a very
healthy emotion and of course…

He pauses, drowned out by a loud grunt from Buffy as
she punches the bag with great force, causing it to
split. Gile's eyes widen slightly. Over Buffy's
shoulder he sees Anya, Oz, Willow and Xander enter the
library and smiles in a slightly panic stricken
manner.

Giles: Willow! Xander! (calms himself) Tea?

FADE OUT TO BLACK.
FADE BACK IN – SUNNYDALE HIGH LIBRARY.

The scene is approximately as it was when we left.
Giles stands holding a cup of tea. The others are just
standing around. Buffy has left to clean herself up
after her training session.

Giles: (frowning into his teacup) You- you see,
although – of course- anger is a very healthy,
um, emotion, I just…

Anya: You think that she should stop behaving like
such a big sissy baby.

Giles : Well… No! I-I just think that she needs to
move on. (he wipes his eyes wearily) I don't know,
maybe one of you could have a word with her?

Willow: And tell her what?

Giles: I- I don't know. (pauses) Plenty more fish in
the sea? That, um, although anger is a very…

Xander: Healthy emotion, yeah, you mentioned that.

Oz: I don't know, she's pretty wigged. No closure.

Anya: Men are evil. (Realises Xander is there and puts
an arm around his waist.) Mostly.

Xander: (sentimentally) Awww. (confused) I think…

CUT TO SUNNYDALE LIBRARY THE NEXT MORNING

The group are gathered in the library, Wesley is still
sitting labelling new text books – he appears to be
pretending not to listen to Alice and Cordelia who are
speaking at the table.
Alice has a sheet of paper in front of her.

Alice: And how would you say Mr Whyndam-Price reacted
during, say, Buffy's experience of telepathic ability?

Cordelia looks blank for a moment.

Cordelia : Uh, (smiles brightly) Good? Really, uh,
Watchery.

Alice: (sighs heavily) Wonderful. But I rather think
that the Council will require more than that, Willow?
(she gestures to Willow) Willow dear would you like to
help me?

Willow grins and takes a seat at the table.

Alice : How versatile would you say Mr Whyndam has in
fulfilling his duties as a Watcher?

Willow : Uh, he, um, did that Protection spell with
us, and he isn't a witch even.

Alice : (sweeping hair back from face) Yes, I, um,
actually I was there if you remember.

(Willow giggles, Alice, despite looking tired cracks a
smile).

Alice: Yes, yes well, maybe we should continue with
this at another time. Is Buffy back with
lunch yet?

(Gathering her papers up in her arms Alice looks
around hopefully. Giles comes out from his office with
a tea tray and places it on the table, he puts a hand
on Alice's shoulder to prevent her from getting up.)

Giles: If we could stay stereotype free for another
half -hour or so please Alice. Here, tea.

(Alice takes the tea and smiling, begins to drink)

Alice: So, Willow. Is there a reason for all of this
distracted behaviour? Or is it simply that the giddy
joys of youth have finally permeated the library
walls?

Willow: (giggling) Where dizzy with them.

Oz: She's dizzy. I'm more… Accepting.

(Alice rolls her eyes and sips her tea. Willow
giggles).

Willow: We're going to the Bronze tonight.

Alice: Oh, oh that caveman thing. What is it called
again? The Primeval?

Oz: We get to prove our worth in front of our
womenfolk, (he fiddles distractedly with his guitar
strings, then looks back up) and sometimes, there's
pudding wrestling.

Alice: Pudding wrestling?

Oz: The great leveller.

Cordelia: (Loud enough that Wesley can hear) It's not
just for couples though, I mean, if Buffy's going to
be hanging around like a loser…. (pauses, looks
slightly peeved that Wesley appears not to have heard)
I think there should be a Watcher there.(places hands
on hips) A big group of tasty young teenagers like
that, and… I mean… with pudding! It's like a vampire
snack bar, that's what it is. Anything could happen,
think that you'd be failing in your duty as Watchers
if didn't post someone there.

Alice: (grinning) I'm game.

Wesley: No! (clears his throat) ahem, that- that- is,
being closer to the age group, and with, your
current…And of course…That is with the… (he begins to
blush) I am her Watcher you know!

(Wesley blushes as he realises that everyone is
staring at him)

Wesley: I 'd be, um, failing in my duty if I didn't
go.

Willow: (grinning) Oh, yeah, with the duty…

(Alice suppresses a smile)

Giles: Well, I think that, a- a-as long as

( He is interrupted as Xander comes running into the
library, he skids breathlessly to a halt and clutches
the table).

Xander: Watcher! Watcher in the building. I uh, ok
another Watcher in the building is what I mean.
I…There… In the… Woman, British accent, dark hair,
asking for, uh, Buffy Summers or Mr Whyndam-Price. So
I thought. Watcher.
(He pauses and looks around at the
rest of the group)
and that's never good right? I mean, not that I think
all Watchers are evil but you've got to admit that
there does seem to be a fairly high incidence of cruel
and pointless Slayer testing when they're around.

Giles: Xander?

Xander: Uh?

Giles: Do Shut up. (pinches the bridge of his nose
wearily) Alice? Are you aware of any visiting
representatives of the council?

Alice: Not that I know of. Wesley?

Wesley: I-that is I… No.

(The door swings open, they turn to face it. Wesley
and Giles unconsciously drawing themselves up to their
full height in a 'look at me, aren't I strong and
responsible way', Alice remains seated. The woman who
strides through the door is thin, short, maybe an inch
taller than Alice 5' 4 or 5'5. She is aged between 57
and 60 but does not appear to be infirm in any way.
She wears the usual female Watcher dress of a plain
grey/brown tailored skirt suit. Her jaw is strong and
she has a stern, dour expression. Her hair, although
still dark does not appear to be dyed, more likely the
product of an Irish gene somewhere in her ancestry. It
is cut in a severe bob cut. She wears a Rosary and a
crucifix.)

Woman : Alice.

Alice: Martha? (Alice rises from the table and steps
towards the older woman. As she steps away from the
table it becomes noticeable that she is expecting.
She's no Cordelia *g* But due to the cut of her suit
and the fact that she was thick set to begin with
there is definitite bumpage)

Martha: Alice? (she stares at Alice)

Alice : Oh.

(Alice takes Martha to the other side of the library.
The camera does not follow them. Giles remains
standing beside the table. Xander seats himself at the
table and takes a cookie from the tea tray.)

Xander: So? Why the sudden extra Watcher? Or is she an
Observer too? Or a peeper?
(they glare at him)
Oh yeah, 'cos *that* would be stupid.

Giles: (staring at Alice and Martha) She's not a
Watcher. (frowns and gathers up the tea things) Her
name is Martha Charnen. She…That is. She's not a
Watcher.

(Giles clams up and turns to take the tea things. He
lifts the tray and turns to take them back into his
office. As he turns away he is met by Martha standing
in front of him. She slaps him in the face with the
flat of her hand . Hard.)

CUT TO AD BREAK

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