'BASTARD!'
'Yes!' Giles blocked the blow from Buffy's staff with his forearm. 'Yes, use your emotion.'
'Bastard!' Buffy swung down hard with the staff. 'Bastard!'
'Good girl Buffy!' Giles dodged and swerved beneath the staff. 'Come on!'
'BASTARD! UTTER COMPLETE BASTARD!' Buffy began to increase the ferocity of her blows in time with the rough staccato of her curses. 'JERK WEED!'
'Yes…' Giles shot a nervous glance towards Buffy as he narrowly escaped her staff. 'Yes, um, do you think perhaps…'
'Bastard.' Buffy muttered through gritted teeth with each swing of her staff. 'Bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard…'
'Buffy?' Giles stumbled winded beneath his padding. 'Yes, quite. Um, B-Buffy…'
Buffy swung the staff high above her head once more.
'Bastard! Bastard! Bastard! Bastard! Bastard! Bastard!
'FOR GOD'S SAKE BUFFY I'M NOT A BLOODY VAMPIRE!'
Buffy dropped her staff and glared darkly at Giles.
'I-I shouldn't have yelled.' Gile's pulled himself to his feet and rubbed his aching limbs. 'That, that is of course it can be easy for a Slayer to forget her strength in the heat of…The library.'
Buffy drew the back of her hand across her face and kicked her staff away from her.
'Buffy I…' Giles watched as his charge began to beat an innocent punching bag with an awesome savagery . 'I-I-I realise that anger is, is a very healthy emotion and of course…'
The end of his sentence went unsaid, drowned out by the animal grunt issued by Buffy as her fist penetrated the bag's skin in a cloud of sawdust.
Giles swallowed wide eyed and backed away slightly. 'Willow! Xander!' He yelped as he spotted the two students over Buffy's shoulder.
'Willow, Xander.' He repeated calming himself. 'Tea?'
Giles frowned into his teacup. 'You-you see, although-of course- anger is a very healthy, um, emotion, I just…'
'You think that she should stop behaving like such a big sissy baby.' Interrupted Anya bluntly.
'Well…' Giles paused thoughtfully. 'No! No…I-I just think that she needs to, um, she needs to move on.' He sighed and wiped his eyes wearily. 'I don't know, couldn't one of you have a word with her?'
'And tell her what?' Asked Willow, not unreasonably.
'I-I don't know.' Giles frowned and sipped his tea. 'Plenty more fish in the sea? That, um, although anger is a very…'
'Healthy emotion.' Interrupted Xander. 'Yeah, you mentioned that.'
'I don't know.' Oz perched on the table and began to tune his guitar. 'She's pretty wigged. No closure.'
'Men are evil.' Anya frowned briefly and placed her arm around Xander's waist. 'Mostly.'
'Awww.' Xander paused in confusion. 'I think…'
Alice sat across the desk from Cordelia, She sighed heavily and scratched her head with the end of her pen. 'And how would you say Mr Wyndham-Price reacted during, say, Buffy's experience of telepathic ability?'
Cordelia stared blankly. 'Uh, good?' She smiled brightly. 'Really, uh, Watchery.'
Alice sighed wearily and began to clean her glasses. 'Wonderful, But I rather think that the Council will require more than that. Willow? Willow dear would you like to help me now?'
Willow sat down with a grin.
'How versatile would you say Wesley has been in fulfilling his duties as a Watcher?'
'Uh,' Willow nibbled on her lower lip thoughtfully. 'He, uh, he did that protection spell with us, and he isn't a witch even.'
Alice swept her hair back from her face and let out her breath slowly. 'Yes, I, um, actually I was there if you remember.' Alice gave a tired smile as Willow giggled to herself. 'Yes, well, maybe we should continue this another time.' Alice gathered together her papers and made as if to rise. 'Is Buffy back with the lunch yet?'
'No.' Giles paced across the floor from his office and placed a tray of tea things onto the table. 'Here, tea.' He said as he prevented Alice from rising by placing a slight hand on her shoulder.
'So.' Remarked Alice taking a custard cream and a sip of tea. 'Willow.'
Giles took his hand from her shoulder and, pausing to gather his own teacup, removed himself wordlessly to his desk.
Alice began again. 'So, Willow.' She smiled. 'Is there a reason for all of this distracted behaviour? Or is it simply that the giddy joys of youth have finally permeated the library walls?'
Willow giggled. 'We're dizzy with them.'
'She's dizzy.' Oz placed one foot on a chair and balanced his guitar on his knee. 'I'm more…Accepting.'
Willow giggled once more as Alice rolled her eyes. 'We're going to the Bronze tonight.' She chirped happily.
'Oh, oh of course.' Alice began to wipe her glasses on her jacket. 'That caveman thing, what is it called again? The Primeval?'
'We get to prove our worth in front of the womenfolk.' Oz tested the newly attached E string and began tune it more to his liking. 'And sometimes there's pudding wrestling.'
Alice blinked. 'Pudding wrestling?'
'The great leveller.'
'It's not just for couples though!' Cordelia slammed her books down on the table top and craned her neck around the group.
Alice raised an eyebrow. 'Pudding wrestling?'
'Guh.' Cordelia snorted and rolled her eyes heavenwards. 'The Primeval. I mean, if Buffy's going to be hanging round like a big fun sucking loser…' Her words trickled away as she continued to crane her neck wildly.
'He's in the office marking up textbooks dear.' Murmured Alice distractedly as she began to write up the results of her interviews.
'I-I-I.' Cordelia crossed her arms across her chest. 'Why should I care where Wesley is?'
'A question to which I for one have no answer.' Giles lifted the empty tea cups from the tabletop. 'Nor any great desire to contemplate.'
Cordelia pursed her lips. 'I don't care, he-he could be on…'
'Mr Giles I think perhaps this is the maths masters personal property…' Wesley dropped a copy of 'Women of the Amazon' across which he had partially stencilled the words 'property of Sunnydale high'. He coughed, and began to blush as he fumbled on the floor for the glossy hardcover. 'I, that is Miss Chase I…'
Cordelia sniffed haughtily and turned back towards the older Watchers. 'I just think there should be a Watcher there.' She stated loudly, affecting ignorance of Wesley's presence. 'A big group of teenagers like that, and…I mean with pudding! It's like a vampire snack bar that's what it is. Anything could happen, you…'Cordelia placed her hands on her hips. 'You'd be failing in your duties as Watchers if you didn't post someone.'
Alice grinned. 'I'm game.'
'NO!' Wesley cleared his throat.' That, that is…Being closer to the age group,' he stuttered,
'and with your current…And of course…That is with the….I am her Watcher you know!'
Wesley blushed as all eyes fell on him. 'I'd, um, I'd be failing in my duty if I didn't go.'
Willow grinned. 'Oh, yeah, with the duty.'
Alice inspected her fingernails and suppressed a smile.
'Well, I think that, a-a-as long as….'Giles was interrupted as the flailing form of Xander came running into the library, clutching at the tabletop as he skidded breathlessly to a halt.
'Watcher!' Breathed Xander. 'Watcher in the building!' Xander stared up at the people gathered around him. 'Ok, another Watcher in the building is what I meant…I, uh…In the…Woman, British accent, dark hair, asking for, uh, Buffy Summers or Mr Wyndham-Price, so I thought, Watcher?' He paused and looked around him at the group. 'Not that I think all Watchers bode evil or anything…'
'But they're not a good sign.' Oz turned back to his guitar and stretched the string a little tighter. 'And they very rarely bring gifts.'
Giles pinched the bridge of his nose wearily. 'I-I think that…Gifts?' Oz shrugged. 'Alice.' Giles turned to the two Watchers at the table. 'Are you aware of any visiting representatives?'
'Nope.' Alice shrugged. 'Not that I know of. Wesley?'
'I-I…That is… No.' Wesley frowned quizzically. 'Perhaps the…'
The library doors swung wide open, leaving the end of Wesley's sentence to hang in the air.
'Alice?'
Giles and Wesley unconsciously drew themselves up to their full height, chests were puffed out and throats were cleared in an intelligent manner.
'Martha?'
The group stared at the intruder. A vinegary woman towards the end of middle age, she wore the crucifix and grey tailored suit which had so alarmed Xander, black eyes burned in a dour un-made up face set against a severe bob cut of still dark hair. Clasping a rosary in a pale weathered hand she paced straight-backed into their midst, and stared back.
'Martha I…' Alice stuttered. 'Sit down.'
'Celia. Celia is dead.'
* * * * *
'Kay, I got us Thai chicken, some sort of pasta stuff.' Buffy began to pull the packages from her paper grocery bag, 'A big bag of chips, some fruit.' Listed Buffy, placing her purchases on the table top, 'And a…Who the hell are you?'
'Buffy' Giles passed her a teacup in greeting. 'Miss Charnen is…that is…'
The older woman raised her head. 'The Slayer?'
Buffy stiffened at the sound of her accent. 'They've sent another one? Giles?' Her voice rose. 'What, they don't have anything better to do? Just keep sending more to deal with the bad seed and she'll toe the line? Is that it? Well you don't scare me, ok. So why don't you just…'
'Buffy.' Interrupted Giles softly. 'Miss Charnen is not a Watcher.'
'She's not?' Xander frowned. 'Wesley, have you been using Buffy to impress chicks again?'
Giles carried on without response. ' And please, there is no call for that sort of behaviour Buffy.'
'Well why is she here then? Don't try and tell me that she's not with them somehow.'
'Dead?' Alice's tone was unusually slight. 'I-I-I-I-I…' She stuttered and ran her hands over her jaw. 'We…I-I-I…' A deep breath shook her shoulders. 'Was it them?'
'Celia?' Cordelia placed a spoonful of unidentified pasta based foodstuff into her mouth and pondered the name. 'Celia, Celia.' She frowned. 'Celia the dog?'
'It was them.' The rosary beads twisted through the older woman's fingers. 'They, they came on a…It wasn't a moon night, none of the wards were in place…'The beads flowed faster. 'By the time we found them, it had passed and she was…' She set her jaw and raised her head to stare at her friend. 'It has begun.'
'And when the first has been taken, the dark one will rise and shall have the second.
And there will be a black quickening.
That which will come into this word without a soul shall be, and with it they shall bring the dark times and lead us into the night.' Dzecthel slammed the book shut with the flat of his hand and blinked in the cloud of dust. 'Nice.'
'We didn't write the damn thing.' Hiliare Gilchrist sniffed, flicking a nonexistant speck of dust from his sleeve. 'And you mentioned something about information?'
'I don't just give this stuff out for free.' Dzcethel sneered. 'What makes you think I won't just rip your throat out?'
Gilchrist smiled sharply. 'Judy.' He called into the darkness behind him. 'Judy dear could you come here for a moment?'
'Ah do wish you would refrain from callin' me that.'
Dzecthel stepped backwards as the slick grey green bulk of the popocatepetl demon stepped from the darkness, ducking lightly beneath a protruding rafter.
'Ah'm fully aware that it is a ladies name.' The creature extended a lengthy claw and stared at the points of light glinting along it.
'You think I'm scared of that?'
Hiliare raised an eyebrow. 'Well he terrifies me, but perhaps not…' He delicately shielded a yawn. 'Judy.'
'Jaudkah!'
'Judy dear, would you care to remove the tarpaulin?' Dzecthel leapt back once more as the tarpaulin to the left of him was torn away exposing a duo of vampires to the dull light of the warehouse interior.
'Dingo. Our voweless friend here would like to tear my throat out. Ideas?'
As the larger vampire crashed against the bars of the cage in which they were confined, the smaller lifted his head at the sound of his name.
'Ideas?' It remarked in an accent which spoke of koalas, of tinnies, of shrimps and of barbies. An accent unhampered by a century of cultural refinement and which made Steve Irwin sound like a big old girly poof. 'I think he's just shit 'imself mate, you don't need ideas when you've got Tiny here.'
'So.' Hiliare tapped out a rhythm on the arm of his chair. 'As I am fully aware that you, Mr Dzecthel have been told to give your information to us gratis. Oh don't look so surprised Mr Dzecthel, we're mercenaries you don't think we check these things? And as you are so obviously terrified of my little team, would you care to divulge exactly what your Dr Villiem has told you?'
'W-What the…Who…What is it?' Stuttered Dzecthel staring at the vampire's foaming jaws as they closed around the rusted bars of its cage.
'Well, Dingo here calls him Tiny, although I believe he's also widely known as 'Aargh'.'
Hiliare cracked his knuckles and held out a cigarette to Dzecthel. 'Usually we refer to him as Bastard.'
'Bastard?''
'It's short for Sadistic Degenerate Bastard. Would you care to shake hands? I'm told that Dingo has trained him to perform that little trick with anything up to a seventy percent success rate nowadays. No-no I can see you're not the hands on type. So, the information if you please.'
'The second. He goes to the local high school. He's weak as a kitten, refuses to accept himself for what he is. You'll have no trouble.' With the animalistic vampire placated Dzecthel's confidence grew. 'My employer demands only one thing as payment for his help.'
'Then your employer had better buy himself a dictionary and look up the word mercenary.' Murmured the bored looking Englishman. 'We're not in the habit of giving out our services for free Mr Dzecthel, with the obvious exception of Judy of course.'
'Ah do not have to take this.' Dzecthel watched in fascination as the rippling compost coloured beast, which could have inspired H.R. Giger to give it all up and sell encyclopaedias, put it's 'hand' to it's face and sniffed haughtily. 'Sometimes Ah swear you don't know how deep you can cut a demon.'
Hiliare blinked. 'Your demands Dzecthel?'
'He wants you to you use a specific woman for the, well, you're aware of your job.' Dzecthel placed a hand inside his jacket. 'No just sticking a pin in the hospital records.'
'There are... Requirements.'
Dzecthel drew a photo from his inside pocket. 'Yes, yes, yes, woman of magic, no more than four moons, still silent.' He straightened his jacket. 'Big hips too for what it's worth.'
'Anything else you want to add?'
'You're doing it?'
Hiliare considered the photograph. 'I see no reason not to.'
'Then it's a deal.' Dzecthel's hand hung unshaken in the air as Hiliare turned and gave the photograph to his employee. 'Right.' He let his hand fall awkwardly to his side. 'I'll tell him that you're on board.' He turned to leave.
'We are however still in the brotherhood of Wolfmonat 's employee.' Called Hiliare after the retreating vampire. 'We retain the right to use someone else, if we have to.'
Dzecthel paused mid step. 'And I might not tell you what the slayer looks like. If I have to.' He smiled coldly and walked away, flinching as the crazed vampire flung himself at the bars of his cage.
'Oh my...' Drawled Jaudkah wistfully as he watched Dzecthel leave. 'Ah do so hate it when a perfectla' good demon goes native like that.'
Ripper opened his eyes lazily as he felt the icy waters lap around his throat. Don't recognise this. He lolled his head back, his mind as numbed as his limbs. His unfocussed gaze drifted towards his surrounding. Water? He frowned. Better get out soon, you stay too long in water wearing jeans it'll dye your legs blue. Blue legs, He'd get the piss ripped right out of him for that. Better get out soon then. Just have a bit of a kip first. Voices? He opened his eyes and watched the two women walking a dog in the distance. He let his head fall back again. All arse and sensible shoes, not worth getting up for. Probably two of the lezzers from St Hilda's anyway. Snotty cows. A sudden movement in the water next to him drew his attention. Bloody dog. Piss off I'm trying to sleep.
'You shouldn't let her off the lead.'
'What have you found girl?'
Why didn't they just let him alone? He relaxed his eyes and let the darkness already claiming the corners of his sight fill his view. Why couldn't they just bugger off, all he wanted was a few minutes…
Giles awoke in a cold sweat.
'Giles?' Buffy's voice called through the letterbox. 'Giles are you alright? Can I come in?'
'It's open.' Called Giles, his Watcher instincts as ever preventing him from a simple 'come in'. If there was only one useful thing that the council taught it's representatives it was that whilst a locked door kept few enemies at bay a carefully worded greeting would pay for itself.
'Giles?' Buffy peered around the door. 'Are you feeling ok?'
'What?' Giles pushed his fingers through his hair and reached down to put his glasses back on. 'Yes, yes, just an unpleasant dream that's all.' He blinked the grit from his eyes and turned to her . 'Just an, um, unpleasant dream.'
'An Eyghon dream?' Buffy and Willow faced him with concerned frowns.
''In a manner of speaking.' Giles slid his glasses back on and peered into the gloom. 'Was, um, was there something you wished to discuss?'
'Nope.' Buffy shook her hair out from her collar and shrugged carelessly. 'Just finished patrolling and thought we'd stop in on the way to the Bronze.'
'Buffy.' Willow tapped playfully at her watch. 'You don't want us to stay Giles?'
'No, no. 'Giles smoothed his hair back. 'You, um, run along to the Bronze.'
'Run along? Ok mom.' Willow smiled softly as she turned back to shut the door. ' Call ok. If you ever need to talk. Don't make me nag.'
Giles raised an eyebrow and returned her smile. 'Ok mum.' He echoed watching the girls leave. 'Have fun.'
Giles poured himself a glass and sat back down in the semi darkness of his flat.
To have that dream now. He sipped at his drink, unwilling to find oblivion through that method.
What heroically dreadful timing the memory exhibited.
Alice sat deep in the old armchair, second hand, if not third or fourth. It was nice to have something that had belonged to another person. New furniture jarred against the soul.
She stuck out her bottom lip and blew a rogue strand of hair away from her face.
'You're very big.'
'Pardon?' Alice frowned as Martha stared at her rounded abdomen . 'Oh.'
'How far gone are you?'
'Oh, gosh, only three, no wait four months, fifteen weeks. Apparently I'm carrying low, Mrs Summers says that…'
'Why didn't you phone?' Martha's sharp tones barked through Alice's mild inanities.
'I-I-I…'
'You thought, what did you think? That I would…That the council would…You're not some damn slip of a girl that…' The blackened polished wood rosary beads threaded through Martha's fingers once more. Dark loops around her angular, blue white, digits. Like shadow and light, moving at the speed given by practise and not murmuring the words aloud.
'When were you going to tell us?'
'I-I thought perhaps…'
'No, no you didn't think.' Martha's jaw tightened. 'Don't you trust me? And what about your uncle? You'll have to phone him first thing in the morning.'
'It...the time.'
'Accounting for the time difference of course.' Martha bent and lifted her handbag from the floor. 'Where's your kettle?'
'It, Um.' Alice pushed her hair away from her face and frowned recovering her equilibrium. 'Amazingly enough it's in the kitchen.'
Alice closed her eyes and listened to the sound of Martha's shoes as they tapped across the bare linoleum to the kitchen, the pipes groaned and bubbled as the tap was turned sharply on and off, the kettle filled and set to boil. The tiny, shrill rattle of the teaspoons as they were dropped into the cups drilled into the sensitive area of her consciousness and she felt the muscles at the back of her neck begin to tighten.
'Do you still take sugar?'
'What? Um, pardon, I mean, no.' Alice pushed herself to her feet. 'No thank you Martha, I have to, that is I must continue my Observance.' Alice draped her jacket over her arm and picked up her own handbag. 'The slayer is, I must…' Alice paused at the door. ' I'll be back later.'
Shutting the door of her flat behind her, Alice rested her shoulder on the cool white plaster and slid a hair pin across a stray curl.
'Well.' She pushed her glasses a little higher up onto the bridge of her nose and breathed in deeply. 'That went well.'
* * * * *
'Oogah!'
'Ooooogaaaaaaah!'
'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRG!'
'Hey?' Xander grinned as he wiped a clod of free flying pudding from his cheek. 'Free desserts.'
'Xander. You have food in your hair.' Anya stared. 'Who threw food at you?'
His reply was drowned out as the skin clad MC began to yell into his microphone once more.
'ONE-AH! TWO-AH! WE HAVE A WINNER!' 'He grabbed at the wrist of a goo coated youth and pulled him to his feet, flicking more globs of gelatinous confectionery into the crowd.
'Tell the Bronze, kid. Who are you and which of these fair maidens were you doing battle for ?' He thrust the mic into the face of the wide eyed teenager whose mumblings were accompanied by the sound of girlish squeals from the crowd.
'And how do you feel now?'
The gangly youngsters stuttered into the mic. 'I'm, like, you know.'
'Just say yabba dabba doo.' Hissed the compere through a fixed grin. 'Just say it and leave the stage.'
'Uh, YABBA DABBA DOO!'
'Yabba dabba doo?' Buffy raised an eyebrow as she sipped her coffee. 'Stretching the theme much?'
Willow nodded. ' Fair maidens? That's not even stone age. It's, renaissance, I think.'
'Ahuh.'
Willow bit into her chocosaurus rex muffin. 'Not to mention how demeaning to women the whole idea is. I mean what are we, possessions? Prizes? To be won like - OZ!'
Oz held his coffee carefully out of harms way as Willow flung her arms around his neck.
'Evidently today, we are.' Muttered Buffy under her breath.
'Will, Buff,' Oz nodded a greeting. 'Xander.' Xander nodded back as Anya wiped his face with the back of her sleeve.
'Oz I thought you were going to be late!' Willow fluttered around the taciturn guitarist, 'Did the van break down again? It did didn't it? And you had to walk all this way I bet. Well you tell Devon he's chipping in for the repairs this time it's his...'
Oz let Willow's chatter fade into the background and caught Buffy's eye. 'Having fun?'
'I've had suckier evenings. Nothing's actually tried to kill me yet. I'm counting that as a big plus mark.' Buffy shook her now empty coffee cup. 'Anyone want a refill? Mocha? Cappuccino? Mochacinno? No?' She left her seat and brushed herself down. 'Well don't leave the country while I'm at the bar.'
Xander watched her walk across the club. 'Trying to drown your sorrows in caffeine and sugar.' He shook his head sadly. 'Just gets you buzzed and angry.'
Anya frowned silently for a moment in Buffy's direction. She turned questioningly to Xander and put her hand tenderly on his arm. 'Xander?'
'Hmm?'
'What's a mochacinno?'
'So are you playing tonight?' Xander paused with his coffee halfway to his mouth. 'Do you need any help bringing in your, band, uh, stuff?'
'He's not playing his guitar are you.' Willow shuffled excitedly on her seat. 'He's going to...'
'As long as you're not taking part in that stupid Primeval. Which of course you are.' Xander paused. 'And it is of course in no way stupid, the opposite in fact, it's downright - I'll stop talking now.'
'Oz is going to tell where people come from by sniffing them.' Trilled Willow excitedly.
'Nope.' Buffy shook her head. 'Not stupid at all then.'
Xander raised his hand gingerly. 'Uh, I'd like to just point out that if only for a moment, I'm now the coolest guy in the Scooby gang?'
'And yet you still used the phrase 'Scooby gang'. Yeah, that's real cool.' Cordelia flicked back her hair. 'If you're a complete dork.'
'Speaking of which.' Buffy smiled icily. 'Wesley, how nice of you to bring Cordelia along to help you babysit.'
'It, that is, Miss Chase was, and.'
Cordelia sniffed and hitched her 'I gave Wesley a lift.'
Buffy raised an eyebrow. 'I'll bet you did.
Alice eased herself through the heaving throng. 'Excuse me.' She wove around the dancing teens. 'Coming through.' Alice paused thoughtfully behind the unmoving expanse of back for a moment. 'Would we mind moving please dear?' She stared at the immobile breadth of black tee-shirt. 'Only I'm actually giving up smoking and as you can see there's rather a lot of smoke in this particular...' Alice shifted her weight from foot to foot as the shoulder blades stayed resolutely at eye level. 'Oh I give in!' A surprisingly sharp elbow found it's way under the immobile youth's rib, wedging him out of the way as Alice burrowed onward through the crowd.
'Xander dear would you mind awfully getting me a drink?'
'Just call me, drink...getting type guy - I'll stop talking again now.'
Buffy stiffened noticeably as Alice slid along the padded bench beside her. 'I'll come with you.'
She snatched her purse from it's resting place. 'Help you carry.' She shrugged and pressed a thin smile between her lips. 'What's the use of slayer powers if you can't help with basic lifting?'
Oz tilted his head as they merged into the crowd. 'Can't argue with that logic.'
'ARE YOU RRRRRRREAAAAADY ?'
The by now slightly limp MC paused for breath. 'You all know what time it is right? RIGHT?'
A mildly confused chorus of woohoos, Yeahs and various noncommittal voice modulations seemed to suggest that no, everybody did not know what time it was, but they were pretty damned buzzed about it.
'We've reached the verrrry LAST of our pre-submitted challenges. Once this Rrrrrrrrrampant young buck,' -Oz raised an eyebrow. Although this could have been a trick of the light- 'Has fought for his mate, won or lost in her name, we will be drawing all future challenges from...THE BOX.' A rather lack lustre spotlight lit up an article which, despite it's fake fur covering, was still clearly recognisable as the recently disappeared complaints box from the bar, before returning once more to the stage.
'All night men, and women...' The MC grinned into the crowd, 'have been placing their own challengers into, THE BOX, and as soon as we've completed our next feat some of those lucky names will be drawn out and given the chance to prove their potency to the bronze.' The MC gave another oily grin to the assembled young women pressed against the foot of the stage. 'But first. OZ!'
Oz stepped to the front of the stage and blinked a little as the spotlight swung round to him.
'OZ!' The MC moved in for an ingratiating shoulder squeeze and reconsidered. 'So, son, would you care to name your prize?'
Oz cleared his throat and leant forward. 'Miss Willow Rosenberg.'
'WILLOW RRRRRRRRRRRROSENBERG!'
The spotlight swung out over the crowd and picked out Willow's waving form.
'COME ON UP!'
Willow blushed as she was pulled up on stage and pushed into the aluminium foil covered 'throne' at it's centre.
Eventually the MC turned his attention once more to Oz. 'Rrrrrrreaaaaady?'
Oz shrugged.
'First, we'll go through the terms. Give you a chance to back out, After all, 'The MC turned to the crowd, 'There's bravery in knowing when to give up too right?'
'HELL NO!'
The MC grinned. 'They are of course, right. Should you give up now Willow will be returned straight to THE TRIBE!' The spotlight illuminated a baying crowd of 'skin' clad young men at the far corner of the stage. 'Should you fail in your task she will also be returned to THE TRIBE!' Once again the motley collection began to hoot in recognition of their name. 'In fact, you are going to have to try very hard indeed to keep me from returning her to THE TRIBE!'
Oz shrugged. Again.
'Young man. NAME YOUR TASK!'
Oz leant forward and spoke gently into the microphone. 'I sniff people.' He paused. 'And know where they come from.'
The MC paused thoughtfully. 'You sniff people?'
Oz gave a solemn nod.
'And you can tell where they come from?'
'In Sunnydale.'
'In Sunnydale, of course, don't want to start out to big.' The MC wiped his sunglasses and cleared his throat. 'Can we have a volunteer from the audience to be SNIFFED BY OZ!'
Buffy stared at the grunting, hooting tribe and screwed up her nose. 'Can't say I'd want to be Willow.'
They're mostly Dingoes.' Xander stepped back slightly as the crush on the dance-floor grew. 'Or in the pay of Dingoes. Oz told me.' He frowned. 'And can I take a moment to be insulted on behalf of my sex?'
'Lower north side.' Oz sniffed. 'Near the cannery.'
'CORRECT!' The MC lifted Oz's arm in victory. 'So far you have proved yourself to be a worthy, uh, sniffer. One more correct... sniffing, and you will have succeeded fully. Are you ready?'
Oz shrugged.
'So, umm, Anya is it?' Alice sorted distractedly through her handbag. 'How are you adapting to umm...'
'They took your cigarettes whilst you were in the toilet.'
'Oh.' Alice dropped her handbag on the seat next to her and leant back. 'So, um, gosh, a second crack at humanity eh? Is it...fun?'
Anya stared out with distaste at the whooping mob on the dancefloor. 'It doesn't seem to have changed much since the last time round.' She thought for a moment. 'People have better teeth now.'
Alice yawned. 'You read my mind dear...'
Oz took a deep breath and let the scents mingle in his nose. If he was going to be brutally honest with himself this wasn't going to be hard. Willow had classes with this guy. And he'd driven her to his house a couple of times. Luck of the draw.
'Uh.' Oz breathed in sharply. His stomach twisted up in knots and the hair began to stand up on the back of his neck. This, not good. He frowned as he tried to work out what was upsetting him. Jonathon smelt fine, well, as fine as a slightly tipsy, highly embarrassed, mildly sweaty, seventeen year old is ever going to smell. Human. Oz focussed in on the figures in front of him, Willow, Jonathon, Devon and the guys. He closed his eyes and began to build up pictures from the scent of them, holding on to the familiar in an attempt to steer clear of what he could feel happening. A sickness began to build in him as he felt the wolf start to rise.
'Oz?'
Oz screwed his eyes shut. The deeper darkness was creeping in at the edges of his sight, he...Stopped. Nothing. Oz cautiously opened his eyes. Mindful of the lost time of his usual transformations.
'Oz?' The MC's grin had become even more fixed than usual. 'Would you like to do your stuff now?'
Oz frowned slightly. 'Odd.' He blinked. 'Oh, uh, he lives near the Cemetery of Our lady of the Thorns. To the west of it.'
'CORRECT!'
'So.' Buffy offered her coffee to the grinning Willow. 'Uh, yay Oz?'
'Yup.' There was a moment of celebratory jiggle. 'In, uh, a totally non-demeaning, consensual, even handed way of course.'
Buffy raised an eyebrow. 'But of course.'
'Woo.' Xander returned from the bar. 'Way to make the wolf work for you.'
'Woo?'