A Rupert By Any Other Name
written by Gileswench

Rating: FRT
Spoilers: None really, set early in S2.
Summary: Giles won’t share. Jenny doesn’t like that.
Author's Notes: This one comes to you courtesy of Challenge #86. What is Giles’ middle name?
Feedback Author: Gileswench
Author's Website: Wench's Tavern

Jenny giggled and ran a finger down Giles’ chest.

“Come on, Stuffy, tell me,” she said.



“And I suppose you have a poultry fetish, do you?”

Jenny flopped onto her back.

“I don’t do birds,” she said. “So unless you tell me, I’m going to frustrate us both.”

Giles rolled over, looming above her. His grin was wide and fiendish, just the way Jenny liked it.

“So be it,” he said and rolled out of bed. “I suppose a cold shower is in order, then.”

“Rupert! Come back here.”

He turned and leaned against the wall, folding his arms across his chest. Jenny couldn’t help but marvel that he was so unselfconscious about his naked body. He’d taken forever to not quite spit out an invitation for their first date. Now he was utterly shameless. She’d expected the shyness to continue into the bedroom, but it didn’t. Whenever Jenny thought she understood Rupert Giles, he seemed to morph into something new and yet more interesting. She slid closer to the edge of the bed nearest him.

“Is it really that bad?” she asked. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“I already know yours.”

“You know my middle name? How do you know it?”

“Willow tried to show me a few tricks on the…electronic beast…”

“It’s called a computer.”

“Yes, precisely. The electronic beast. Anyway, she tried to show me how to find information on people we wish to investigate. For some reason, she thought using your employment record with the school district might make it more interesting to me. So, Jennifer Madeline Calendar, I know all.” His smile broadened. “Superior intelligence is an advantage I don’t give up easily.”

Jenny stuck her tongue out at him.

“All right,” she sighed. “I know when I’m beaten. Come back to bed and make us both happy.”

He did precisely that.

* * * * *

The next morning, Giles mounted the steps of Sunnydale High with a spring in his step and a song in his heart. It had been a long time since he’d spent such a thoroughly happy evening in the arms of such a beautiful woman. He felt relaxed, energized, and optimistic about life.

As he swung open the door to the library and headed for his office to put away his briefcase, he paused in surprise to find Buffy, Willow, Xander, Cordelia, Oz, and Jenny all gathered around the computer. There were definite snickering sounds.

“Hello,” he said uncertainly. “Good joke?”

The laughter started in earnest.

“Best. Joke. Ever,” Buffy managed through her guffaws. “Who would’ve guessed Rupert was your middle name?”

“I thought your parents sucked before,” Cordelia said. “But this is just plain child abuse, assuming you ever were a kid.”

“Suddenly, I’m liking my mom and dad a whole lot more than I did this morning,” Xander added.

“It’s not really so bad…is it?” Willow asked. “I mean, at least they gave you a not completely gross and horrible middle name.”

“Still, it’s pretty harsh,” said Oz.

Giles blanched.

“You didn’t,” he said in a flat voice.

“Yes, I did,” Jenny said.

“That wasn’t fair.”

“Hey, I’m not the one who made a huge issue out of it. If you didn’t want me having Willow look it up, you shouldn’t have told me how you found out mine.”

“I didn’t tell anyone else about yours.”

“It wouldn’t have been as funny,” Buffy said. “Madeline’s nothing to get all bent out of shape about.”

“Yes, but…but…this…this is just evil.”

Jenny smiled like a cat and tapped his lips with her finger.

“Tit for tat, Ethelred Rupert Giles.”